Always surrounded by so many hoes.

Lucky: You were single on Friday…2 days later, you’re not. Did you have a breakthrough weekend?

JBelt: I kinda did. I’m glad we talked about it beforehand. While it was unexpected, and precipitated by a set of events, I consider it altogether fortuitous for me. Strange weekend, and hard. Now you know why I was less than responsive. 

Lucky: Do you feel better now?

JBelt: Like a new man. 

…and that was that.

Last weekend, I went out of town for Nicole’s bachelorette weekend after my last romp with JBelt. We all headed out Friday afternoon—I was all cozied up in the backseat ready for the two hour ride. I had a lil vodka prepped and I was enjoying the gossip with the other ladies in the car.

I was a few drinks in when who decides to text me? John. Remember him? The former coworker who thinks he is God’s gift to women? Uh, yeah.

After that awkward Saturday night with him a few weeks back, he sent me a few texts on Memorial Day, wanting to know how work was and such…

He asked me when I would have a free weekend to hang out again. Ummm…how about never?

The whole thing just irks me. Like, if he was in town for other reasons and we were to grab lunch, I would probably be okay with that, but I don’t want him coming into town just to see me, let alone stay at my place and spend the whole weekend with me. Eeeww…

I told Boots the situation, and after he was finished rolling around on the ground laughing, he said, “Just sleep with him, THEN he’ll leave you alone.”


I replied to John, telling him my weekends were pretty books with trips. Not a lie, but I was hoping he would take the hint.

Here is the thing about John. When we worked together, he would always tell me that he could read women so well and at the first sign they didn’t like him, he was out of there. The problem is, he is so full of himself, there’s no way he would ever believe a woman wouldn’t love him.

When he lived in town, he was seeing this woman named Jenn. In fact, they lived together. But to everyone, he referred to her as “his friend,” when they were exclusively dating (at least I’m sure she thought that). It was shady. That’s a whole other reason I was shocked when he said he wanted to ask me out when we worked together…uhmm didn’t you have a girlfriend? That you LIVED with?

That’s my justification of John the asshole.

Anyway, after I told him my weekends were pretty booked, he says, “well just let me know, I had a great time and would love to do it again.”

I didn’t reply, and figured I was completely off the hook and in the clear.

Until he texted me Friday afternoon, that is.

John: How have you been?

Lucky: Pretty good.

John: How is work?

John: Small talk doesn’t really work with me. I was hoping we could go to dinner again. 

Lucky: I’m not avoiding small talk. I’m in the car getting out of town.

John: I didn’t say you were avoiding it, I just meant I didn’t want to have small talk. 

John: Where you headed?

Lucky: Btown

John: I am headed there in a few weeks for a concert. 

John: Should be a good weekend for you guys. 

I never responded. I was honestly just pissed he was bugging me again. I haven’t heard from him since, but if I do, I suppose I’m going to have to tell him the truth—fuck off.

And guess who else I got text-messages from last weekend? A guy from high school that everyone hated. Oh? And then I ran into an ex-boyfriend who was addicted to cocaine…never seen him in town, yet I run into him hours away. I go back to the hotel room around 4 am, and wake up to two missed calls from Clay (pool guy with the girlfriend) and these texts:

Clay: what you doing?

Clay: I for beat up tonight

Clay: I got

Clay: well he was bleeding. I’m not everyone says I beat ass but my head hurts bad

Clay: stupid shit. guy wouldnt leave ppl alone so i stepped in. He didn’t like it so I hit hit a lot

Clay: I want to see u

Clay: Can I come see you? no

Clay: Is like too

Clay: So you don’t wanna hang out

Like GOD. DAMN. I freaked out when I woke up and saw the kid basically had a conversation with himself. Like, it’s no secret he has a girlfriend, they are back to posting pictures of themselves on Facebook with the accompanying “I love you”s, so peace out mother fucker.

My final thoughts on the matter?

Guys annoy me.

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8 thoughts on “Always surrounded by so many hoes.

  1. Amen!! Ummm you did not tell me you saw TANK!!! A phone call is an absolute necessity tomorrow so that I can hear that shit with my own ears!

    Damn when it rains it really pours.


  2. I actually forgot about it completely until I went through my texts and saw I told someone. We both just ignored each other.


  3. Dennis Hong says:

    Seriously? NINE text messages without a response from you?

    Who the fuck are these guys you’re meeting, Lucky?

  4. That is crazy that he texted with himself…. Let him serve as an example of why I don’t do cocaine.

  5. Matthew says:

    I bet you that guy (Clay) probably spent a good 30 minutes trying to order from a drive-thru that was closed.

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