I’ve figured out that the Hilfiger House Par-Tay commercial comes on every night around 10:30. And I’m loving it every single time. It’s sort of like that feeling of excitement you get when a movie you own comes on TV. It feels exclusive or something.
But yesterday, I experienced an equally good feeling.
I think I’m finally on the other side…of my ex. You might recall a little more than a month ago, he sent me a shitty message via gchat reminding me that in fact he wants to get married, just not to ME.
At the time, this comment really upset me. But thinking about it now, I realize he’s an idiot, because he’ll never have anything this good.
And so, I hadn’t heard from him since then. Didn’t wish him a happy birthday or a happy turkey day a-thank-you-very-much (first year for that). Until yesterday he sends me this text:
“I have a meeting first thing in the morning in (your city), so I am heading there tonight. Pretty good chance my dad and I go watch a movie in your area.”
A few observations here.
1. I don’t care. In fact, I didn’t even get my stomach all up in knots, like I usually do when he texts me. I had no feeling.
2. Thanks for the warning.
I waited a few minutes, wondering if I should respond, what the point was…etc. I went ahead and asked:
He says, “i don’t know some george clooney movie I think. all I know is that I’m staying with my parents tonight and I am pretty sure my dad wants to go to a movie. He likes that theatre by your apartment.”
I can see the movie theatre from my living room windows.
What I don’t get is the point of him texting me. Nowhere in either text is an invitation to join him and his dad for the movie, for dinner, or for a cocktail. I wouldn’t go, but I’m just saying.
A year ago, perhaps even months ago, I would have loved this. I would have begged to meet them prior to the movie, would have hoped to run into them. But instead I was thankful that I had plans keeping me out of the apartment during peak movie hours and blackout curtains to close when I come home (the ex knows the AREA I live in, but doesn’t know which building, floor, or window, it is).
Bottom line: even these two little texts are a huge reminder of why my ex sucks. Everything is about him. Like OH YOU’RE COMING TO MY AREA??!?!?! WOW let me just drop everything and go meet you, the guy who never introduced me to his friends, never invited me to his apartment, never cooked me dinner, and let me converse with your dad!!! Half of the pair that I sent a holiday card to every year, never got one in return, never even got a thanks! from.
This was our entire relationship. Him only seeing me when he was “in the area,” never going out of his way or moving his schedule to see me. And when I pointed it out, like I did so many times, I was the bad guy. I was the one who didn’t want to see him; who didn’t want to change my schedule. That’s how I was so easily manipulated and that’s why it has taken me more than a year to heal.
So, what was I doing last night instead of cackling my face off that my ex was across the street? I attended the resident Christmas party.
Sounds sort of dorky, but they had an open bar…always good…free food from California Pizza Kitchen…and they gave away awesome prizes! I went alone, and at first it was super awkward, especially when my leasing agent stopped by and was all “You’re all by yourself, you should’ve brought a date!”
But then, my neighbor across the hall came and sat with me and we talked the whole night! It was a good time—he won one of the top prizes; a kindle. Bastard.