Facebook Statuses From Last Night: Gizzy’s Cousins Edition

For all of eternity I have said that if I ever get married I will elope in a foreign country and invite only my parents, my husband’s parents, and Lucky.  Here are some examples of why:

I present to you each of my cousin’s most recent facebook statuses, plus a little commentary from me:

you think your so hick by the way you talk and what you wear.. news flash hun, clothes can be bought, and you clearly watch the guys too much.. you cant just be a hick after one summer, you should be your whole life.. you gotta live it not wear it.(: (No. No smiley face. First, like 15 people liked this status.  Second, yes the way you talk and what you wear is what makes you a hick. After that one summer I am assuming the individual she is referring to participated in hick like activities such as riding 4 wheelers, attending monster truck rallys, and wearing camouflage not for funsies but to hunt wild animals – as one must do these summer activities in order to be accepted into the coveted hick crowd, which my cousin is clearly a part of.  If you ask me, talking hick + dressing hick + participating in hick like activities = hick – but what would I know? I’m an outsider.)

The first nite we hang out we wrecked ur truck, went to jail u lost us job, ur license and got chared with endangering my life and u still want to be with me . I only have one question y? (Christ.)

just because you live in our state doesnt mean your a hilljack, just because you got a pair of boots doesnt mean your cool.. just because you drink mcdonalds sweet tea does not mean your not from the south.. (So like, what’s the effing deal with hilljacks and why would anyone in their right mind try to be one on purpose? Also, I’m confused in regards to the McDonalds sweet tea.  First, we are not from the south.  Second, did I miss the memo that it is only acceptable for Yankees to drink McDonalds sweet tea to prove to other disbelieving northers they are in fact from the north? It’s arguable that people all around the world drink McDonalds sweet tea everyday because not only is it good, but it is 1 dollar. Also, boots do make you cool…

…The club does not lie.)

ya right, like i really coulda said somethin, you wouldnt have heard me if a train was coming.. (??? I dont get it? This is the status of the mother of the two hick-wannabe haters so that kind of explains it.)

At home watchin tv (Someone actually liked this.)

Brad locked himself in the bathroom. Stuck for 1/2 hr. Chad was throwing a fit the whole time. Grandpa and grandma had to take the door off to get him out! Then they just sat in the floor hugging each other. Must be a twin thing……….(LOLZ!!!)

Heading back from lunch… Gonna be a good day… Cold day… But a goodern 🙂 (Maybe cousins 1 & 3 from above could direct their hilljack posing friends to this cousin for hilljack lessons.)

I got an infestion problem at the house today. So if anyone goes by my house don’t yell out immagration. There’s a crew of mexicans fixing my roof. (Le sigh.)

Ya know fightin in a basement offers a lot of difficulties.. #1 being your fightin in a basement!! (I’m not sure that I care to know what this is about.)

Apparently my mom can roll a joint out of a sugar packet and parsley flakes what can ur mom do? (Unfortunately, I was present for this.  On our cruise last year my aunt did indeed roll a joint out of a sugar packet and oregano, lit it, and pretended to smoke it. Her son is proud.)

To funny!! We are eating at taco bell, and the we will rock you song comes on. The part where they say ” you big disgrace” Riley yells out loud ” you biscuit case” lol I thought it was to funny not to share 🙂 (LOLZ^2!!)

Exactly one year ago today Kyle told me he loved me for the first time!! I love you!!! ❤ (Oh fuck off, you’re 19 you don’t know what love is.)

So, hey, happy Wednesday everyone – from my family to yours.
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5 thoughts on “Facebook Statuses From Last Night: Gizzy’s Cousins Edition

  1. Sweet tea makes me want to ralph. Guess I’m not southern!!!!!!

    -L

  2. justmarriedgirl says:

    Is your cousin starting a fight club?

    I thought the first rule was that you don’t talk about it.

  3. earth says:

    Ty! You made my day!Bookmarked!

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