WF Seeks job, will offer sexual favors for employment

I’m to a point in my job where I just do not give a flying fuck.  I don’t care if I’m late, I don’t care if I miss meetings, I don’t care if the work is done, and I don’t even care if I get in trouble for all of the above.  I would be ecstatic if I got fired, etc..etc..etc.. I’ve been relentlessly applying for new jobs in the city that I want to live in and before even being given an interview I already care about these companies more than the one I currently work at.  This is a problem, right?

Here’s what I don’t want, I don’t want to start a new job and be all amped up about it at first and then fall into the same pattern as my current job a year later.  This time, I want to do it right and make sure I’m going to love the job before I accept anything, even though I am pretty despie to get out of the big city.  I have compiled a list of the top 5 (legitimate) things I hate about my current job:

  1. Lack of communication between higher ups
  2. Un-organization (lack of training, lack of “who to go to if you need this” lists)
  3. Lack of fun activities to keep employees motivated
  4. Micromanagement
  5. Co-workers
  6. Task work flow (I had to add an extra for good measure)

I probably complain about my co-workers the most, but I think I could deal with them if the rest of the office environment was better.  This is the thing, I hear about other people’s jobs and I get really jealous of the fun things they get to do at work.  I have a friend that works for a pasta company and she gets to travel every few months to cool places, her office pays for her to take classes to learn Italian during work hours, they also send her to Italian cooking classes during work hours.  She’s not some big wig, she does marketing.  One of my new roommates works for a medical supply company, and his boss occasionally takes his team to the golf course for a day of fun instead of making them work.  But my office? We get a Christmas lunch and a fiscal year end party, where as we are supposed to be able to leave early after them but my boss makes you feel like you’re doing something wrong if you do. 

My company is known as a place where fun comes to die, seriously.  So why I expect to get treated to a day that doesn’t make me want to kill myself is beyond me.

Anyway, I have put every important person I know on the hunt to find a new job for me.  I even stooped so low as to ask the owner of the company my mom works for to help me out.  But he said he would see what he could do.  If it gets me a job, I don’t care who I have to have sex with.  Despie Debbie up in here.

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