It’s a beautiful day here at Cocktails when Gizzy & I are back at Camp Life Sucks. As I’m sure you’ve noticed by now, this circle of life just keeps on giving.
I suppose things COULD be worse. After all, I am still showing up to work, which is a miracle.
Since my beloved roommate passed, it’s been rough. I know, it’s just a cat, but my apartment is so lonely without my furry friend. Truthfully, that week was one of the most difficult. I had 11 deadlines, I was dealing with my cat, and the married cheater, all at once.
Sleep was not an option.
Since all of that, I got a new perspective. I made it through a real shit storm. So, when BEX texted me, or when my hot neighbor nearly hit me in the face with a broom and then laughed at me, I walked on without so much as a blink.
At this point, there’s not much I give a shit about. I’ve worn makeup 3 times in the last 2 weeks, and showing up to work without a shower or combing my hair is pretty standard. And I don’t care at all.
My apartment is a wreck. Two weeks worth of clean clothes are scattered all over the place, stacks of mail cover my dining table, and office supplies are in my bed. I have yet to move or throw out any of my cat’s things.
Honestly, I’m just trying to make it. It’s a struggle to even show up at work, so when I get there looking like shit, I feel pretty good. The only thing that keeps me going is my work… I’m still doing it.
Every night, I have crazy dreams. Sometimes, they’re about my cat, or about a cat I had before him (her name was Lucky :)). I have even had a dream about Bex. In the dream, he doesn’t say much, he just holds me while I cry. The dreams are vivid and I wish I didn’t have them, but I do, and I’m just dealing.
Truthfully, my friends have been a huge help this last month. And my family has been there for me, too. But since I can be honest here, I wish one of my parents would have come to stay with me. Even if only for a few days, just so I wouldn’t have to be alone so much.
With the recent death of HSC, Gizzy and I have a new take on dating… just say no. People are trash, and maybe it took us years to get it, but we finally did. And from here, Shit Creek can only get better.