Spilling my big secret (part 3)

A few days later, David’s wife saw a picture posted on Facebook of him and a friend, a girl. She got jealous, and said she wanted to talk.

Both of us knew the talk would probably be the end of “us”—whatever that was.

Sure enough, she admitted that the problems in their marriage were because she hadn’t made an effort to fix things. She promised to try harder, and a line in the sand was drawn: 2 months to change, or they’d part ways.

In order to give the marriage an “honest try,” he said we needed to be friends, friends only.

Of course, I was saddened by this news. I wanted nothing more than for him to admit that his feelings for me were undeniable, and he’d show up at my door (with it raining outside)…hehe.

But, this was the best way it could end (as opposed to her showing up at my house with an axe).

The “2 month” thing is arbitrary and I don’t really get it—they aren’t going to get a divorce—but that’s probably something on their end that I just don’t understand.

I was scared shitless to tell anyone, because I was ashamed. I felt guilty; I felt like a home wrecker. But I told Gizzy, and as my friend, she was kind and didn’t judge me.

It was enough to give me the courage to talk to my counselor about it, and piece together some answers.

The bottom line is this: I am still a broken person trying to find a connection. When I found it, it was strong, but he is married. And to me, that’s just a symbol of where I’m at right now.

I’m close, but not quite there yet.

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2 thoughts on “Spilling my big secret (part 3)

  1. Matthew says:

    I’m sorry Lucky. Perfect comforting words evade me right now. There really isn’t anything I think I could say that wouldn’t sound trite and cliche’.

    Considering that, this is where I’d go to a reliable fall-back. Not sure how much of a ‘hugger’ you are but I’m pretty much a rock star when it comes to providing just the right type of hug needed for any situation.

    So, if it counts for anything this a virtual hug offered.

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