Instead of going home like I should have, I went into crazy drunk girl mode and told this guy my whole life story including the part about my recent breakup where I choked up and got teary eyed as I said it. Really? REALLY GIZZY? Really. Who knows what else I told him. Eventually Chuck did what she does best and invited these guys back to my apartment for an after party. It was 9pm.
We stopped and got a case of beer (that no one drank). Chuck and the other guy were dancing around my living room while I sat on the couch and slowly got more and more upset that these guys were in my apartment.
Eventually the guy I was talking to asked if he could kiss me and I told him no. Of course, that didn’t stop him from trying anyway a little later. I went with it for a few seconds then started crying because not only was I not ready to move on, I don’t do the whole drunken make out with a stranger thing because I’m a giant prude.
Chuck and the other guy passed out and I eventually made my way to my room, just wanting to go to bed and forget about the whole kiss. Except this guy followed me to my bedroom. I agreed to let him sleep in my bed, but put the whole ” we’re JUST sleeping” thing out there. The guy went in for the kiss again, then I started crying. He figured out that I was not down for that and said he would just sleep on the floor. I laid in bed, tears streaming down my face texting Lucky, Gigi, and Betty about what had happened.
Gigi called so I ran outside continuing to cry/hyperventilate as I told her what happened, and how I wasn’t ready to move on and how now I missed NB even more than before. She calmed me down and reminded me that not every guy I tell my life story to has to be my boyfriend or a potential future husband, this was just the first kiss since NB and it didn’t have to go in that direction if I didn’t want it to. Which is a great point, I don’t really do random and usually any guy that I even so much as kiss turns into a dating situation – so I never separate the two. Anyway, she talked me into going to sleep and just forgetting it happened. But around 4am I heard the guy get up, he said the floor wasn’t very comfortable and got back into my bed. Um okay what about the fact that I don’t want you here? The guy tried kissing me again and I just turned away. As soon as the sun came up I was in the living room poking Chuck telling her to get up so we could go get my car. Mostly I just wanted these guys out of my apartment. We dropped them off at their hotel and sped off. There’s no doubt in my mind that this guy thinks I am bat shit crazy, because I was, but I honestly don’t care I never have to see or talk to him again so whatevs.
So with that, I had a major set back. Finally, last week I had the first day that I didn’t cry over NB, then this happens and I feel like I’m right back to where I was a blubbery emotional trainwreck. I guess all in all it was a good way to show me that I just need A LOT more time, should steer clear of guys in general right now, and obviously need to cut back on the drinking until I’m emotionally stable.