Tag Archives: amazing

I HAD A DATE!

Yes, you read that correctly! I went on a date—a BLIND date—Friday.

Since dating D, I’ve only been on one date…and it wasn’t so great (not horrible, but we didn’t go on a second date).

While I’m not in a mind-space of thinking that I necessarily need a boyfriend, I am starting to get bored with myself. Like GOD, can I just leave the apartment once in awhile? Or go and get dressed up for drinks, or something?

So, I jumped at the chance when one of my girlfriends from college sent me a text saying she had a friend she thought I’d be compatible with. I trust her, and she’s got great taste…besides, I had nothing to lose, so I told her, yes I was down for it.

I didn’t really think it was going to happen—not saying she’s a flake by any means, I just didn’t know how serious she, or this guy, was. But about a week later, he sent me his name and asked me out for dinner and drinks via text.

It took everything I had not to Google him; I wanted to go in totally blind. However, I gave Gizzy his name and had HER Google him and just tell me if she saw any red flags right off the bat. She didn’t, so I was glad.

So, Friday, he offered to pick me up and take us downtown to a nice wine bar. When I saw him, in the street, I was pleasantly surprised. He was fit, clean cut, dressed in a button-down shirt, with a small tattoo near his wrist.

We walked a ways and started talking, as we headed toward his car. He opened my car door.

At the wine bar, we both got wine flights, tasted each other’s wine picks, ate some food, and talked. A lot. And I shit you not, he told me I was gorgeous, and that he was surprised our mutual friend didn’t mention how “lovely” I was.

I was nearly blushing—no one has ever said those things to me.

Around midnight, we went for a walk downtown, and found a small, quiet bar to keep talking and get a few more beers. Turns out, we have quite a bit of things in common.

When the bar closed, he took me home, walked me to my door, and gave me a kiss. It was very sweet.

When I got into bed, he’d sent me a text: “Thank you so much for the company tonight. You were more incredible than I imagined. Goodnight and sweet dreams!”

He called me last night, and asked me for a second date this Friday—we are going to a rooftop sushi place. I’m pretty excited, and of course, I’ll keep you posted!

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Cleanse…my soul?

Hey all!!!!!

Today is day 1 of my 10-day Advocare cleanse.

I feel like Advocare is a pretty popular cleanse choice, but don’t worry if you don’t know what it is… I’ll explain.

Basically, it’s a 10-day cleanse that consists of Advocare fiber drinks in the morning, and herbal supplements before bed. In between, I’m supposed to drink 4 liters of water, and eat anything that does NOT involve salt, sugar, white flour, starch, red meat, caffeine, alcohol, or dairy… or anything processed.

Yeah.

I did a similar cleanse a few years ago, and while it’s tough in the beginning, you feel GREAT afterward. Since you are ridding your body of toxins, by the end of the cleanse, you are relying on nothing but good things, so I found I slept really well, and my body woke up on it’s natural clock.

Aside from that, you lose a few pounds, but you feel so light and airy.

It’s kind of amazing.

The annoying thing about the cleanse is the preparation—you have to make everything from scratch so you can ensure there is no salt, sugar, etc. in it, so it takes awhile. Advocare recommends you prep ALL of your meals ahead of time, so you don’t get frustrated and run to the nearest fast food joint.

Smart.

So, I spent yesterday binge eating and drinking, while preparing all of my foods for the week. I made grilled chicken skewers (with veggies), brown rice, cleanse-friendly turkey & bean chili, hard-boiled eggs, plain oatmeal, and hummus. I even chopped, and bagged, all of my veggies to eat with the hummus.

So far, I’ve already drank about half the water I’m supposed to (I went to the gym this morning, so that helped), I had the fiber drink (disgusting) and I ate my breakfast (1 serving of oats, small serving of raw almonds, 1 serving of mixed berries) and I’m enjoying a cup of caffeine free apple cinnamon tea.

…So far so good… we’ll see if that continues.

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Songs I’m obsessed with right now.

1. White Walls by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis

2. Royals by Lorde

3. Dear Marie by John Mayer

4. Crooked Smile by J Cole featuring TLC

5. Give it 2 U by Robin Thicke with 2 Chainz

6. Body Party by Ciara

7. Love More by Chris Brown, featuring Nicki Minaj

8. Wait A Minute by Justin Bieber, featuring Tyga

9. Dark Horse by Katy Perry, featuring Juicy J

10. Bass Down Low by DEV, featuring The Cataracs

Those are my JAMS right now! What songs are you dancing to?

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Time to lay on the couch.

Tomorrow, I meet with my therapist (Lopez) for the first time in a month.

He’s been trying to push my appointments back to once a month, but I protested, until now—I felt like things were going pretty good.

And I would say, for the most part, things are pretty good.

You might recall my post last week, which was basically a list of successes I’ve encountered just in the last month. Really exciting!

But over this last year, I’ve found that in moments of success like that, sometimes it’s even more difficult for me to put on a happy face.

I don’t know exactly what it is, but I’ve got one theory.

I feel like I get so excited over these personal victories, but then my high comes crashing to a halt when I realize I’ve got no one to share my success with.

Okay, maybe that’s a little bit dramatic.

I do have good friends.

But I don’t have that guy…you know; the one who’s going to come see me succeed, cheer me on, and tell me how proud of me he is.

Am I pathetic for wanting that?

Over the weekend, I was asked to participate in a literature event; where I would sell books, do an interview, and a reading.

Wow… that’s been one of my biggest dreams for almost 10 years.

I was giddy. And I pictured myself there. And it was amazing.

And then I pictured the event being over, and me, alone, packing up my things and driving home to Blanche, my cat, then me eating leftovers, and crawling into bed by myself.

Sad.

I know these things take time, and I know, I’ve been through a FUCK TON this year. My emotions are certainly changing every single day.

But I’m just ready for things to be even keel. I’m ready for things to be okay again.

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Gah! So much to say…

Hey all,

I know I’ve kind of been half-assing it over here on the blog…but that’s because I’ve got so much going on in the other areas of my life, which is always exciting.

You might remember a few months ago, when I quit working for the magazine. Well, since then, I’ve gotten so many offers for freelance work—it’s crazy! I took on a job editing someone’s book, which has been interesting and lucrative.

I am also meeting with a local magazine publisher this week to see if I can help her create more magazines—sweet!

Last week, I published my first Kindle book—I published it myself, but I’m still so excited that I’m now an author; something I’ve always wanted to be. Once I get the hang of it, I plan on publishing many more digital books!

For the last month, I’ve been working with an old friend on a podcast about relationships. We recorded our pilot last week and are recording episode 2 this week.

While my job is still pretty much same ole, same ole, I actually got a raise; my first raise ever!

When things with my career are going well; that often means I am in high spirits, too. And I’d say, for the most part, that is true. I’ve always hoped that my career would be booming with writing opportunities, and that is definitely the case today. It really is an amazing feeling.

On another front, yesterday was the first day of fall—my favorite season. I am looking forward to burning pumpkin candles, making apple cider and pumpkin bread, and maybe I’ll even enjoy watching a little football.

I hope you all are busy with the things you love lately—here’s to a happy fall!

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Wait for a Minute.

Anyone heard Justin Bieber’s new song, feat. Tyga, “Wait for a Minute”? …Because it is AWESOME.

Between hearing that on Friday and seeing The Biebs walk with Maywether to the ring, my love for Bieber has been rekindled. Not that it was on the rocks or anything.

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Alright, enough of the bullshit, it’s time I come clean about me and this trainer. Here is what you need to know. His name is CR and he is a professional fighter and he’s really, really hot.

I want to post a picture of his naked body for you; but he has many distinctive tattoos that would give him away. After all, he was on a reality TV show last year.

When he started training at my gym, I was still dating D. I took a few of his classes, but honestly didn’t think much of it.

And then when D and I broke up, I thought he was cute. Then I thought he was kinda hot. Then I thought he was sexy as hell.

You know how it is.

At the gym, he would always talk to Marcy, but not me, so I thought maybe he was into her. Then one day he asked me why I never took his class.

“I do,” I said.

And that was that.

Then around mid-August, we added each other on Facebook.

That’s also the same time I discovered he was engaged.

A few days later, at the gym, I told him he was a pussy—really just kidding around. He told me I would pay for it during my next workout.

And he kicked. My. Ass.

“This is all your fault,” he said.

The next day, he sent me a message on Facebook saying he hoped I wasn’t sore…

Two days later, we had phone sex.

We started sending nasty sexts to each other—(in no order):

CR: That ass will be in my hands pulling down

ME: I want to get on top so you can touch

CR: I have my hands on that ass while you wrap ya legs around me against the wall

…Since then, we’ve sent nearly 8,000 messages to each other, including pictures, and we’ve had sex a handful (pun intended) of times.

I know, you’re probably ready to throw your computer or mobile device out the window right now, saying: LUCKY!!!! WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?! HAVEN’T YOU BEEN HERE BEFORE?? YOU’RE INVITING BAD KARMA YOUR WAY…

Yes, yes I know.

I don’t have answers for you.

The only thing I can say is that I’m blaming it on D. I just couldn’t have him be the last person I slept with.

And although CR is engaged AND living with his fiancee, I can say without a doubt, he is THE hottest guy I’ve ever fucked, and it’s some of the best sex I’ve ever had.

That’s nothing to feel bad over, right?

I don’t feel an emotional attachment like I did when I was sleeping with the married guy…which is good.

I hate to say it, but I feel pretty bitter about men these days, so it doesn’t surprise me that CR is willing to cheat on his gorgeous-pharmacist of a fiancee. Because he’s a guy and that’s what guys do, right?

So, if he’s going to cheat, it may as well be with me.

Let the haters, hate.

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Blanche update.

With all this other crap going on in my life, I realized I haven’t posted much about one of the FEW things that makes me incredibly happy—my kitty Blanche Devereaux.

While she is by far the craziest kitty I’ve ever had, I can easily say I thoroughly enjoy her company. She still has her claws, and she finds great joy in tearing up my curtains and my dining chairs.

She has also fallen in love with a trio of felt mice that have jingle bells on the ends of their tails.

But most of all, she loves drinking water straight from the faucet.

Enjoy the picture overload:

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Blanche enjoying the TV…I took this on her first night at my house; I love the spots on her back.

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Blanche enjoying “Game for Cats” on my iPad.

Blanche at the faucet.

Blanche at the faucet.

Tired kitty.

Tired kitty.

Tuckered out.

Tuckered out.

Hope you enjoyed a snippet of my sweet Blanche!

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Call me Abe Froman.

That’s right, I’m playing hooky today just like one of my favorite movie characters, Ferris Bueller.

I have a hair appointment this morning, so I just decided to call in sick and make it a day of fabulousness all about ME.

So, what’s on my agenda? Well after I get my cut & color, I’m meeting one of my old bosses for a sushi lunch—it was a totally random post she made on my Facebook page over the weekend, but I’m completely excited about it.

Then? I think I’ll hang out at Starbucks for a few hours and read and do some blogging…. then? I’m heading to yoga to get my zen on.

And then? I’ll watch Catfish. And it’ll be Nev-tastic!

Days like these are becoming incredibly important to me. I’m slowly rebuilding things back to the life I had before D.

Although I maintained my jobs, my friends, my workouts, etc, during our relationship, I still get that feeling that he came in, crapped on mostly everything, and now I’m just trying to pick up the pieces.

I know I learned a lot, and I showed just how strong I can be, but a big part of me wishes this didn’t happen. I really, really want things back to the way they were.

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Introducing: Lucky & Gizzy’s book club!

For my birthday, Gizzy got me a book, and she got herself a copy too, so we’d have better things to talk about than our loser ex-boyfriends or the computer games we’ve been hooked on.

The book is Best Friends Forever by Jennifer Weiner:

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The book’s description:

Addie Downs and Valerie Adler will be best friends forever. That’s what Addie believes after Valerie moves across the street when they’re both nine years old. But in the wake of betrayal during their teenage years, Val is swept into the popular crowd, while mousy, sullen Addie becomes her school’s scapegoat.

Flash-forward fifteen years. Valerie Adler has found a measure of fame and fortune working as the weathergirl at the local TV station. Addie Downs lives alone in her parents’ house in their small hometown of Pleasant Ridge, Illinois, caring for a troubled brother and trying to meet Prince Charming on the Internet. She’s just returned from Bad Date #6 when she opens her door to find her long-gone best friend standing there, a terrified look on her face and blood on the sleeve of her coat. “Something horrible has happened,” Val tells Addie, “and you’re the only one who can help.”

Best Friends Forever is a grand, hilarious, edge-of-your-seat adventure; a story about betrayal and loyalty, family history and small-town secrets. It’s about living through tragedy, finding love where you least expect it, and the ties that keep best friends together.

…So far, this book is really, really good!

I think we’ve already got book #2 picked out, but if you’ve got any ideas for us, send them our way!

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Remember Jesus Belt? He’s baaaaack.

Well kind of.

If you’re a long-time reader, you’ll remember Jesus Belt (JB) as my old editor for the magazine. I started off hating him, then developed some weird type of crush on him, then ended up getting some amazing oral sex from him during his “break” from a girlfriend.

That is all you need to know.

Occasionally, he will text me to see what I’m up to and how I’m doing—he still works at the magazine, but lives many states away…and still has that stupid girlfriend.

In late January, he texted me because he had had a dream about me. In it, he said, I was wearing a red, formal evening gown, and I was standing among the ashes of a burned building.

To his defense, he was on pain killers.

Yesterday morning, this conversation happened via text message:

JB: Oh, my, god. Every once in a while, you surface in a dream, and it’s just great. Don’t mean it to be creepy, but as a compliment (just woke up from it).

ME: Ha! Were you on pain killers this time?!

JB: Nope! I didn’t even drink last night.

ME: Wow! So what happened this time?

JB: I bet it’s because we only fooled around such a limited amount, and my poor brain is rebelling against the limitations of our experience…Lucky! It was rather graphic; not sure I could just text it all out…combo of the real first night, and then a bit more, a fabrication in-line with what I would’ve liked but never got.

ME: haha, you make me laugh.

JB: Laugh it up, Lucky. I should write it out as well. I can keep it for a bit. Maybe I’ll do that to get myself into the days’ writing.

ME: I’m really glad I make such an impression in your dreams!

JB: I’m glad, too.

ME: You should write it out and send it to me, anonymously.

JB: I’m only pretending to be sensitive. What! You’ll know it was me!

ME: Well yeah, but you’re so bashful about it.

JB: I can do that but I’m not sure I’m interested in a mere one-time exchange…

ME: You want to be pen pals?

JB: Jesus, how are you? I sure hope I didn’t cold text you in the middle of some kind of travesty, all excited about my randy dreams… I’m interested. Fair is fair, is all I’m saying.

ME: No travesty here! I am just sitting at my desk at my lame day job.

JB. Jesus! Well, then…surrounded by co-workers, I’m sure?

ME: No, I have my own office.

JB: Ohhkay! I need to shake off my weirdness and go to work, I suppose. But you ought to Facebook me your address, if you want to receive a note sometime.

ME: I will.

JB: Lets chat more soon; I should get up and get moving. Oh, thanks for the delicious intrusions, Lucky!

ME: You are welcome!

JB: I hope writing it out doesn’t remove it from whatever part of my brain keeps gifting me with it; much of it this morning was just crystal clear: the lightly beaded sweat on the inside of your thighs, your soft little moan, the insistent movements of your hips as you thrust yourself up against my tongue…

ME: Damn. I’ve heard dreams are just random thoughts in your brain…

JB: I don’t think they are ‘random.’ It’s your mind’s relief valve…doesn’t mean you’ll always get what you’d expect to have under pressure, but you’ll get something.

ME: That makes sense.

JB: I probably read your status update a week ago, looked at a few photos like a creep, and then this morning, right before I woke up…there you were.

ME: Oh yeah, I’m sure I looked really hot in my Justin Bieber t-shirt.

JB: Not sure I saw that one.

ME: Don’t look at it.

JB: I wrote a lot last night, wonder if that had some effect.

ME: Wrote about what?

JB: Ha! The healing characteristics of charcoal, and how to make it in the wilderness.

ME: That wasn’t it!

JB: Perhaps you don’t give full credit to the strangeness of the brain. I spent some of that time listening to an interview with Ernest Hemmingway in Spanish, and some part of that time in rage, castigating myself for abandoning so much that’s been important to me, regretful of these last years of editing over writing, management over art…it may be hard for you to see any doors whereby you could slink into my brain within those context, but I’m not surprised.

ME: Now it gets interesting.

JB: God only knows what I’ve assigned you, or even merely the feminine of you, the sweet-smelling distillate of Lucky…the one that got away? One I was too stupid to pursue? The possibilities are endless, as far as your subconscious.

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