Tag Archives: bachelorette

Country Drama (Part 3)

So Betty agreed and said thanks for reminding her that the world doesn’t revolve around her.  It’s about time.  So we headed off to breakfast, ate in the park, and then did a little shopping.  All was good for the first few stores, then Betty started complaining that she wanted to go drink.  So I said the exact same thing I had said earlier, this time not getting much of a response.  I was thinking whatever, if you want to go drink then go drink, but don’t expect me to leave the group like you made me do last night.  Of course she didn’t leave, but things just got more annoying after that.

She followed me around every store, commenting on everything I picked up, basically attached to my ass. If I had to pee, so did she, when we finally did go into a bar for a drink and a light meal, she ordered exactly what I did, down to the no onions and ranch on the side.  

As the evening continued, I just got wasted and left Betty on her own.  If she did her standard wander off to talk to strangers act then I let her do it and if everyone else decided to go to a different bar I left and didn’t try to go find her, I’m no one’s babysitter.  Aside from all the drama with Betty, I ended up having a great time but was definitely ready to get home and back to my solitude on Sunday afternoon.  

The wedding is next month in Florida, so get ready for round 2 of all this drama.  Sigh.

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Country Drama (Part 2)

The hours leading up to the trip were no easier than the few days before.  The MOH had asked that we bring a gift for the bride or party favor for the weekend.  I had known all along that I was going to get some lingerie and some edible whipped cream or something from Victoria’s Secret.  Before we left, Betty informed me that she wanted to stop at one of those disgusting adult stores you see on the side of the interstate on the way to get her gift.  No. No. NO. You’re already making us 5 hours later than everyone else, get something on your own time.  I told her it wasn’t happening and she needed to figure out something else because I just wanted to get there.  I honestly don’t even know if she ended up bringing anything, but I also don’t care.  We finally made it to the house, I was annoyed beyond belief and so happy to see other people.

We had to hustle to get ready and head out for dinner, which was amazing.  The plan was to eat at this restaurant and then go out to the bars in that neighborhood for a not so crazy night, and Saturday would be the big night with all the bachelorette games and goodies on the strip. Near the end of the dinner I kept feeling my phone go off, so I finally looked at it to see that it was Betty texting me from the other end of the table. Sigh. She was saying that she was exhausted and had no desire to go out.  Cool – you do that then.  I just looked at her and acknowledged the text but never replied.  

When we got to the first bar she came up and said she didn’t want to be there, didn’t want to drink, and was tired.  I wasn’t really sure what I was supposed to do with that, “Okay so are you going back then?” She said yeah she thought so, and asked if I would go to the ATM at the back of the bar with her to get cash.  So I went, then she asked if I would stand there and wait for a cab with her.  Fine, would you like me to hold your hand and brush your hair too? However, we weren’t in downtown Nashville and she needed to call one because they weren’t just driving around in this neighborhood, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to look up a number and do it for her. She is a grown ass woman.  So we literally stood on the side of the road for 5 minutes until I finally said, “So are you going to call a cab or what?” She was like yeah, I guess I’ll ask someone inside for a number to a cab place.  So we walked back inside and I said, “Okay I’m going back up on the stage with the girls, let me know when you’re ready and I’ll stand out there with you.” Instead of going to a bartender or bouncer to ask for a number to cab company she followed me back to the stage.  WTF! 

She told one of the other girls that she wanted to go back, but didn’t have a cab number.  So the girl looked one up for her on her phone, and is nicer than me and asked if she wanted her to go with her.  Betty said no, it was fine and told me she was ready to go call and wait for a cab, so I walked back outside with her.  Feeling guilty, I finally offered to go back with her, expecting her to give me the same response as the other girl.  But she didn’t, she said “Yeah I do want you to go back with me.  I know all these teachers that have been abducted when they get in cabs alone in random cities.”  UM WHAT THE FUCK EVER.  That is horseshit, but fine I will go back with you, since this weekend is about you.  So we went back and I got ready for bed.  Since we were the first ones back we were able to claim an actual bedroom and got a bed, no air mattress, after all that drama. I got into bed, and since it was 11 o’clock and I wasn’t tired at all, I laid there and stared at the ceiling.  After 30 minutes had gone by and Betty still hadn’t come in, I went out into the living room to see what she was doing.  Sitting on the couch drinking a vodka soda.  Are you fucking kidding me? She made me leave so that she could come home because she was SO tired, and now was sitting there, not sleeping, fucking drinking? I was P-I-S-S-E-D, so I just went to bed.  Fuck that shit. 

The next day we all got up and started getting ready, earlier that morning the MOH told me the plan was to go to breakfast, do a little shopping, go to the country music hall of fame, come back and get ready, then go out to the strip that night.  Sounded like fun! When I went into our room Betty asked me where we were going that day, so I relayed what the MOH had told me.  Her response was, “I’m not doing that shit. I want to day drink.” Here we go again.  So I finally looked at her and said, “Well that’s great, but YOU don’t get to choose what we do…”

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Country Drama (Part 1)

Over the weekend I went to a bachelorette party in Nasvhille, Tennessee.  I’ve been there a handful of times and Nashville never disappoints, so I had high expectations for the weekend.  The only problem I could foresee was that Betty was going because she can be lot of anxiety and some drama.  

When the emails about the weekend started swirling and the MOH was getting deep into planning, Betty who has been to Nashville several times offered her assistance since she apparently knew where all the cool places were.  The MOH respectfully declined her help and said she would take care of everything.  Betty is kind of a control freak so I expected her to start having anxiety/panic attacks over the whole trip when she didn’t know/plan every last detail. I was also worried that when we actually went out, if people didn’t want to do what she wanted to do she would leave the group and expect me to go with her, which I knew I wouldn’t leave the group, but it would probably be more drama from Betty.  And that pretty much happened.

A few weeks before the party the MOH sent out an email saying she had rented a house because there were so many of us and all the hotels were booked up for some convention.  The house was 5 or 6 miles from downtown so she had also rented us a party bus to take us wherever we needed to go – the whole weekend excluding food and drinks was going to cost us $150.  To me, that sounded pretty awesome, I hate taking cabs and we’d be able to drink in the bus/leave whatever we didn’t want to take to the bar in the bus and have a ride wherever we needed to go.  Betty started complaining that she thought $150 was a lot and the house was really far from the strip, which I just ignored because whatever, if you don’t want to pay it then don’t go.  Then she came up with some idea that her and I should stay with a guy friend from high school, he lives close to the strip and would drop us off and pick us up and then we wouldn’t have to pay the money.  Um, no.  I told her she could do what she wanted, but I was staying with the group.  As soon as she realized I wasn’t going to do that, she dropped it.

The following week the MOH sent out another email saying she had everything booked, but the house only slept 7 and since there were 10 of us, she needed 3 people to volunteer to bring air mattresses.  This is when the freak out really started.  Betty then said that if she was going to have to sleep on an air mattress she wasn’t paying full price.  At first I just tried to calm her down, explaining that 3 out of 10 people had to sleep on air mattresses, and no where in the email did it say she had to be one of them.

A few days later she asked me if I was going to reply to the email.  Which I explained that I wasn’t, because while I do have an air mattress, it’s a piece of shit hand pump one and I sure as hell wasn’t pumping that thing up at 3am when I’m drunk as piss, so I wasn’t planning on bringing it.  To add to it, the planning for this weekend started well over 2 months ago, and when it started the MOH told us all to be sure to take Friday off work, Betty didn’t take the day off  so I automatically was expected to wait for her to get off work before flying out, which also meant everyone else got there a solid 4-5 hours before us.  Of course I wasn’t happy that I had to wait on her, but what could I do? Since we were going to be so late and the last to arrive I expected we would be sleeping on the air mattresses, but I never said anything to Betty for obvious reasons.  I honestly could have cared less though, we were going to be drunk as shit and I would have preferred sleeping on an air mattress alone to sharing a bed with someone anyway.

A few more days went by and Betty started getting anxiety that no one had replied about bringing air mattresses.  Betty said she was going to reply and ask how we would get into the house if they were gone already when we got there and would say we would bring my air mattress but it’s jank and no one would want to sleep on it.  At this point I started to get pissed, like why was this still an issue? She wasn’t planning the weekend, so I told her if no one volunteered to bring them, then the MOH could figure it out – it’s not our problem. But she didn’t, she kept saying she was going to reply until I finally said you know what, if you reply saying we’re bringing an air mattress I guaran-fucking-tee you will be sleeping on it, so if you don’t want to sleep on it don’t say anything. Also, it’s not your air mattress to offer, it’s mine and I already said I wasn’t bringing it, so that’s the end of it. Of course, as the weekend got closer 5 other people volunteered to bring air mattresses and it was no longer an issue.

The day of the trip arrived and I was not at all excited because of all of the stress leading up to it…

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Cheerio ole chap!

Well folks, tomorrow is The Day! Kate and Wills are finally getting married. Did you ever expect me to be this excited? With all the wedding drama this season, and me not having a man anywhere in sight, you’d think I would throw my television out the window at any sight of true love in this world.

I was actually telling Gizzy over the weekend, as I was shedding a few tears, that I don’t like the person I’ve become lately. I’m scared that problems I’ve had with dating and issues I’ve had with my family, have turned me into a cold, bitter person that will never trust anyone enough to love again.

And in some cases, I really do feel that way. But, the fact that I’m getting up five hours before work tomorrow to watch a wedding on TV, shows me that I do have a little bit of that Happy Go Lucky in me.

So, Cheers to the royal wedding! Now, how to celebrate?

Being up so early, I’m definitely going to need some food and drink. But, what? After some minor research, I’ve got a few ideas.

Scones with tea, strawberries and cream, bangers and mash (sausage and mashed potatoes), or perhaps a Royal Wedding Donut from Dunkin Donuts??

Now, if I didn’t have to go to work, I’d definitely plan to pop a cork in the newlyweds’ honor. However, I don’t know if I should show up to the work retreat with a buzz…or should I?

The question remains, why am I so excited?

I’ve never really been interested in royals, however I’m often curious about Princess Diana’s life and death. In what I’ve seen (through many documentaries and made for TV movies) Kate is similar to Diana in several ways.

I’ve always admired Kate. I love love love her classic, yet chic, style. Although she seems like the sweetest, girl next door, we all know she’s stirred the royal pot a little bit (when her mum was caught chewing gum at Wills’ parade!!!). And I loved it when William dumped her, what did she do? Hit the bars in hot little dresses.

But the number one reason I’m so excited, is because it truly is a fairy tale. She’s a “commoner” (if you consider her million dollar parents common) getting to marry her prince—a real prince!

Sigh.

Anyway, after my lovely morning admiring Kate and Wills, I’m off to the work retreat. Then, after that, I’m off on the road trip for the Bachelorette Bash weekend. Here is the latest e-mail we got, regarding the retreat:

Hello and good morning, everyone.  Hope you had a relaxing Easter weekend.

This is a reminder about our upcoming retreat on Friday, April 29.  We will meet at the Suites. Let us know if you have any questions about where to go.  Dress is “casual Friday attire.”  Continental breakfast will be available from 8-8:30 am and the program will begin at 8:30. We are having pizza delivered for lunch.

Walter, from the College of Business will be with us to present the survey results.  After lunch, Craig, an Executive Coach and Strategic Planning Consultant, will speak to us.

Please let Syneesha know as soon as possible if you are not able to attend. Here is the agenda for the day.  We are looking forward to having an enjoyable time together.

8:30-8:35              Welcome

8:35-11:30           Survey Overview

11:30-12:00         Lunch

12:00-12:30         Our Most Important Customer

12:30-12:40         Values Overview

12:40-1:15           Core Values

1:15-2:00              The Meaning of Values/Behaviors Associated with Values

2:00-2:15              Vision Statement

ADJOURN

Sounds really exciting, right? I’ve already heard chatter ’round the office about people wanting to “discuss” certain issues. It’s a well-known fact that the higher up who planned this meeting hates anything off-the-cuff, which is why every minute of the day is planned—no time for Jerry Springer moments. However, this chatter that I’m hearing makes me giddy. I hope someone starts a fire!

Now, about this bachelorette weekend. For the most part, I’m pretty excited. I mean it’s a weekend at a nice hotel, nice pool, and plenty of things to do. And hell, I’ve packed a handle of vodka, a 2-litter of soda, and a bag of limes, so I’ll be fine. But there’s just one thing I’m a little worried about.

Remember that stock the bar party I went to awhile back, with the douche-y husband? Yeah…his wife is going on the trip. Of course she is! Because I can’t just have normal shit happen to me, it all has to be dramatized and have some sort of back story, because I have an anger management problem and therefor I need to be punished.

Hopefully, she won’t walk in with a grudge and confront me about it, but if she does, my liquid courage will save me from confrontational hives.

And last, but not least, did anyone watch The Voice Tuesday night? I absolutely LOVED it…except for one thing—Carson Daly. Seriously Carson, TRL is so over.

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