Tag Archives: diet

I carbed out… sowwwy!

If anyone was keeping track you might have guessed that my 30 day paleo challenge is over and I have been busy stuffing my face with all the carbs in sight, so I haven’t had time to blog plus my hands were dirty with donut jelly. Ain’t nobody got time to be havin’ sticky keys cause they dint wash they hands. Ya feels me!? 

So I was looking through some photos on my phone so that I could post pictures of my favorite paleo recipes, when I found this:

photo

That my friends is a selfie of me smelling flowers at a bar on a Saturday night. Flowers that weren’t even mine, mind you. Remember how pissed I was that Gigi got what I thought should have been my flowers? This is them, and now I understand why he gave them to her instead of me. This is the kind of thing you can look forward to now that I’m back on the booze train.

Anyway, here is one of my favorite recipes that I tried during the challenge.  This one I found on paleoplan.com

Garlic chicken, red pepper, and mushroom sauce on a bed of asparagus 

photo-1

Ingredients:

  • 1 lb boneless, skinless chicken breasts, diced
  • 2 Tbs olive oil, divided
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt (optional)
  • 1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper
  • 1/2 tsp chili powder
  • 1 clove garlic, minced
  • 1 medium yellow onion, diced
  • 8-10 white button or cremini mushrooms, sliced
  • 2 red bell peppers, sliced
  • 1/3 cup coconut milk

Instructions:

  1. Marinate chicken in 1 Tbs olive oil, sea salt (optional), black pepper, chili powder and garlic. Refrigerate for 1 hour.
  2. Shortly before meal time, heat 2 medium skillets over medium-high heat.
  3. In one, saute marinated chicken until browned and almost fully cooked.
  4. Heat 1 Tbs olive (or coconut) oil in the other skillet. Add onion and saute for about 5 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add mushrooms and continue to cook until tender.
  5. Add red pepper, coconut milk and browned chicken and stir. Cook for an additional 5-10 minutes, or until the chicken is completely done.

I made mine into a smaller portion and loaded it on top of some boiled asparagus annnnd it was delicious! Now, please excuse me while I help myself to a package of E.L. Fudge cookies. NOM!

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,

I turned into a hippie freak

As Lucky mentioned yesterday I too am doing a food challenge.  Mine isn’t so much for detox like Lucky’s, but is mostly just to increase overall wellness and a reason for me to take notice of all the garbage I’m putting into my body. And I’ll also say that I’ve done the Advocare challenge that Lucky is doing a few times, and it’s way harder than what I’m doing. WIth that you literally have to make everything yourself and it sucks donkey, so lets give props to her.

I’m doing a challenge to see if I can eat paleo for 30 days. I’m sure by now everyone knows what paleo is, but in the event that you don’t I’ll give you a little run down. There are different versions of paleo and all kinds of rules that go along with it, but the gist is that you eat food that caveman ate.  Which means fruit, veggies, nuts, lean meats and fish and that’s basically it. The super paleo people go so far as to make sure all the fruits, veggies, and nuts they eat are organic and the animals are grass fed and pasture raised. I like the idea of all that; but lets be honest, I’m a baller on a budget and that super paleo shit is expensive. So I do the best I can.  

I decided to do the challenge because of all the health benefits that come along with it. I read that those who suffer from headaches and joint pain often find that changing their diet helps relieve a lot of the ache, it helps clear skin, gives mental clarity and of course helps with weight loss.  So I figured why not, the worst that could happen is I would look good and feel great at the end of it, right? Right.

I’m a few weeks in and started the challenge reminding myself that it was only for 30 days, not forever and as soon as it was over I could have all the PSL (not really cause it’s going to be gone!) and cinnamon rolls I wanted. The only thing I have really had a huge craving for is chocolate and PSL.  And you’re allowed to have dark chocolate on paleo, but it’s just not the same.  Paleo has been around long enough that there are a lot of good recipes out there that are paleo substitutes for anything non-paleo you could want. Except grilled cheese, still haven’t found one for that.  But in general it’s pretty doable, unless you’re super busy, then you’re fucked because if you have a hankering for cookies or banana bread you’ve got to make that shit yourself. The groceries stores just got on board with gluten free stuff, so I’m sure paleo isn’t far behind, but for now we’re on our own.

Anyway, the challenge got me reading labels, something I rarely did before.  I started looking at ingredients to see if things were paleo friendly and realized how much shit I am putting in my body that I really have no clue what the hell it is.  (By the way, my new general rule of thumb when this is over is that if there are more than 2 ingredients that I can’t pronounce/don’t know what it is – I’m not going to eat it. I may regret this decision.) So I started googling. And that lead me to swearing to never put certain foods in my mouth again. One of those being peanuts. Want to know why? 

They add MSG to it.  Riddle me this, why the fuck do they need to add MSG to peanuts? They are born exactly the way you eat them.  There is really no processing needed aside from removing the shell and adding a little salt. But they add the one thing everyone wants to stay away from and people don’t even realize they are eating it because they are peanuts for God’s sake. But they add it, along with a whole gaggle of other shit you probably would prefer not to eat. At some point I’ll scare everyone to death and post everything else I found, but I ain’t got the times right now ya’ll.  

I blame this all on the health nut freaks I work with. They turned me. They turned me into one of them and I like it.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Back on the salad train.

I know I am not the only woman out there who puts her diet on the back burner when you’ve got a guy gushing over you 24-7, right?

D is constantly complimenting me, telling me I’m sexy, and beautiful, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Usually, when I’m dating a guy, I want to hit the gym even harder, jump right into a new diet, and make sure I look good for my guy. But those were also times when I was dating super shallow assholes.

Of course, I still want to look good for D, but when he’s inviting me out to lunch and dinner and drinks, I always chose that over the gym. And then the whole chain reaction thing happens and the next thing you know I’m a fat sloth.

Not quite, but that’s what I feel like.

So, after a few weeks of only hitting the gym once or twice, I’m back at it.

I’ve been to the gym twice already this week (going once more tonight) and played kickball Tuesday night. I haven’t had a drink since Monday, and it was only half of a light beer. Go. Me.

Last night, I threw away anything unhealthy in my fridge and pantry and went grocery shopping for all things healthy.

Then, I cooked. I made lean tacos, skipped on the cheese, but loaded up all the fresh toppings. Then, I made individual cups of steel cut oatmeal with almond milk, cherries, and nuts…yum!

D doesn’t seem too thrilled about my health kick–he isn’t sold on the turkey tacos or my recipe for making him baked chicken wings instead of his usual fried ones.

But I refuse to look back a month from now and not be able to fit into my jeans!

I’m gonna go eat a string cheese now…

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,

11 weeks and 11 pounds

This week has been a real whirlwind for me, first because of all the unexpected contact with guys from my past over the weekend.  Then, as soon as I got to work yesterday I had a missed voicemail from my stepmom, saying my dad was in the hospital.  She didn’t leave much detail, only saying that he was bitten by a snake twice, he was ok, but would be in the hospital over night.

So I started to freak out and basically got nothing done at work yesterday.  It took me forever to get ahold of them and when I finally did they were just kind of ho hum about it.  Apparently my dad was with my grandpa at his country cabin and my dad was mulling around in a wood pile and when he pulled his hand out and it was gushing blood, swollen, and had 4 fang marks where the blood was coming from.  My grandpa had some kind of venom extraction do-hickey at his cabin so they tried that, but it didn’t work so they took my dad to the hospital where his motor skills were becoming slow and he was having trouble breathing… the works.

He didn’t see what kind of snake bit him, but they could tell from the side effects that it was venomous. He is ok, he gets to go home in the late morning and I still hate snakes.  I mean really… could anything else bad happen with snakes? Oh right, I forgot to mention that over the weekend when Betty was visiting she wanted to make sure the snake was in the cage and  we discovered that in fact it is not and Doogie has yet to inform anyone, but took the liberty of shutting off the heat lamp to save some energy and a few bucks.

So I told Anth that because of what happened to my dad it’s totally justifiable that I murder Doogie’s snake if it’s ever found…. and he told me that I need to reevaluate what is a big deal and what isn’t.  I mean…. my dad being in the hospital is a big deal, fucking asshole.  He claimed that me hating Doogie’s snake wasn’t a big deal because it’s a boa and it can’t do anything to me.  But, the simple fact that I could wake up in the middle of the night to that thing trying to choke me out because Doogie is so careless with it is plenty of reason to be afraid of it and want it dead.  I stand by my opinion – Anth’s an asshole!

Anyway… exactly 11 weeks from today I leave for Hawaii!! And that means I am getting down to the diet crunch time.  I’ve been slack assing on the working out because I’ve been super stressed at work, but I made the decision to make myself work out every day for the next 11 weeks and then after that I can go back to being fat.

So, if anyone wants to join my weight loss crusade I’ve done some research and here’s how it’s going down.  3500 calories = 1 pound.  But, you don’t lose a pound just by cutting 3500 calories out of your diet… it has to be a 3500 calorie deficit.  So you start with your resting (or basal) metabolic rate… I’m going with 1200 calories per day, but here’s a link to find yours in case you aren’t a 26 year old, 120 pound, 5 foot 3, female.

So every day my base calorie intake is 1200 calories, anything over is weight gain and anything under is weight loss.  To lose 1 pound a week I need to either burn 500 calories a day by exercising or only eat 700 calories.  So I’m going to need some ideas from everyone on low calorie foods that I can eat a lot of because only lazy days when I don’t want to work out I’m going to need some tasty ideas!

I ordered this Victoria’s Secret seashell/mermaid bikini

I was pretty disappointed last night when I tried it on and it didn’t look the same on me as it does this girl… so, operation lose a pound a week from now until I leave for Hawaii is in full force.  

Any dieting tips/staying strong advice/words of wisdom anyone has…give it to me!

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,