Tag Archives: ex-boyfriend

How did I get so lucky?

As I’m sure you all can recall, I’ve had a tough time getting Snoop-Linus to leave me alone.  We’ve been broken up for over 2 years now, and I haven’t spoken to him in over 9 months.  He’s had like 3 or 4 different phone numbers in that time and always makes it a point to let me know his new number.  I haven’t saved the last few in my phone but I still always knew it was him calling/texting because of the area code. 

After some serious debating with Lucky, we decided that I should save the number as the girl I walked in on him cheating on me with (as a reminder and so it also doesn’t look like I have my ex callng me all the damn time) and put the ringer and text notifications as silent.  Done and done.

The last I heard/knew he was actively dating this girl and he had also told people that he dumped me to be with her.  Harrrrr OK!  The last time I checked I dumped his ass because he cheated on me a babillion times.  But whatevs, as long as I’m not with him I don’t give a flying fuck why people think we broke up.  Anyway… apparently this girl is a runner and every few months she gets bored with Snoop-Linus so she stops talking to him and dates someone else.  HAHA.  I cannot express in words how awesome this is.  But this also explains why he intermittently calls and texts me and acts like we are BFF when really I just wish he would die.

ALSO, my friend that told me that he is dating this whore bag also told me that a few months back she ran into this other girl that Snoop-Linus knew in college at a club and she revealed some pretty disgusting stuff about when he used to cheat on me with her.  The cheating count is up to 4 different girls now.  So this new found whore bag said that she used to come over during the day when I was at class or work and her and SL would hook up, she would and I quote, “Give him really good head and he would smack her ass and they had nice sex.” At this point I’m 200% over Snoop-Linus, so hearing this stuff doesn’t upset me in the slightest, it just disgusts me and makes me thank my lucky stars that I didn’t get STDs from him.  Honestly he just deserves to die and rot in hell, that’s the only way to simply put it.

So anyway, last week my aunt and cousins came up to the big city for a visit.  We went out to dinner and did some sightseeing and when I looked at my phone a few hours later I had a text and a missed call from Snoop-Linus.  Since the last time I posted about how he was annoying me I’ve gotten a few texts but no phone calls…

March 26th

Happy belated birthday!!!! Sorry lost another phone again in Miami this time lol. Hope all is well

April 8th

Happy Easter to you and your family!

April 29th

Heyy! How’s everything been going?! Been thinking about you a lot

And then the most recent, after the phone call last Tuesday June 14th

What up stranger?! Was calling to see how life is going.  Give me a call back.  Would love to catch up with ya! Hope all is well!

So he didn’t leave a voicemail with his call and sent that text instead.  I know the last time I posted about him I went off about why he has to act like we are BFFs.   He’s having a conversation with himself here because I haven’t replied to a text from him since October.  OCTOBER! And he still has the audacity to demand that I call him back.  Whatever douchebag, go die.

I got over being pissed about that and Wednesday night I went to a baseball game with Anth and his GF.  I came back all drunkity drunk and got into bed.  Then I heard my phone start ringing. It was midnight, so I thought that was pretty strange.  I pick it up and it’s Douchearoo.  Wow.  Seriously, what did I do to deserve a double whammy within a week?

I didn’t pick up his call, but I was actually kind of tempted.  It’s been YEARS since Douceharoo called me, I get texts from him every 6 months or so but a call has been unheard of.  I didn’t consider answering it because I so badly wanted to talk to him, I just honestly wondered what he could possibly have to say at midnight on a Wednesday.  Then I realized that I didn’t even need to hear whatever he had to say, because him calling me at midnight on a Wednesday said it all, that he is still the exact same person he was when I dated him.  Going out and getting shitfaced and then drunk dialing everything with a vagina in his phone.  Yep, yeppers.

I was halfway expecting to get a text from him the next day apologizing for the call but I never got anything.  At some point in the midst of all of this while I was at work one day Snoop-Linus threw up a picture on facebook of him looking like an idiot at some rave.  He tagged one of our mutual friends in it so even though we aren’t friends it came up on my mini-feed. I’ve had just about all the Snoop-Linus I can handle, so I blocked him. 

And apparently, even though he can see nothing but my profile picture – he still checks that on the reg. Last night around 10:30 I look over at my phone and see I have a missed call and voicemail.  Then I see it was him.  Gr-eat.

The voicemail…

“Hey it’s me.  Call me back.  Stop being weak and stop like blocking me on facebook girl.”

You all know me well enough to know my reaction to this.  What. The. Fuck.  This is the first time, in a long time, I’ve considered sending him a text saying that if he doesn’t leave me alone I’m going to get a restraining order.  It’s taking everything I have to not snap off and send him a big long message about how big of a schizophrenic psycho he is.  But I’m not doing it.  Deep breaths… deep breaths… and weekend.

Tagged , , , , , , , , , ,

Scum of the Earth (Part 1)

I had my big weekend back at SHIT U this past weekend and it was pretty blahsville.  I didn’t get laid, run into HOTTIE, or even get a make out from a stranger.  All thumbs point to down.  But as always, SHIT U didn’t fail to deliver the drama dramz we all know and love.  

As soon as I walked in Gigi’s door Friday night she told me to sit down because she had some news and I needed to brace myself for it.  She started telling me about how Wednesday night she had to work with Mercedes in a city near where Snoop-Linus lives…  

First, I need to update everyone on my non-friendship with Mercedes.  I just dug through our archived posts and realized I never informed everyone of the demise of our friendship.  Back in November she sent me a shitty text, I can’t remember verbatim what it said but it was something along the lines of saying I should get back together with Snoop-Linus because we deserve each other.  She had told me on a work outing that one of his friends told her he had cheated on me upwards of 10-15 times.  At the time we had only been broken up about 4 months and I still wanted to know the truth so of course I confronted him about it.  Several months later it got back to Mercedes that I had confronted him what she said and of course he denied it.  She got pissed and sent that text, and also sent a text saying, “Mercedes out.” Thank god for that.

I never replied,un-friended her and all of her accomplices on facebook, and didn’t hear from her directly until a few weeks ago. Sometime in January/February she told Snoop-Linus I knew all his passwords when we were dating and that’s how I found everything out, which of course caused a confrontation between Snoop-Linus and myself. Then a few weeks ago she sent me the following facebook message:

hey. i know this is random, but i need my original sims disk back. my current game keeps freezing so i think i need to reinstall it, not to mention theres a new expansion pack coming out at the end of the month, need to have my shit under control by then. pleeease if you still have it, mail it to 1234 Main Street. and let me know if you dont so im not anxiously awaiting the mail lady. thanks!

I hate bitches who think they can do me wrong and then come back 6 months later and expect me to be like, OH YA NO PROB HERE YA GO FRIEND.  No.  I didn’t reply.  I know what you’re all thinking (especially Lucky) why didn’t I block her on facebook from the get go?  Well I should have, but after I un-friended her she blocked me and you can’t block people who have blocked you.  After the time lapsed and the new expansion pack came out she re-blocked me so it’s back to pretending each other don’t exist.  This story is getting more pathetic as I go on now talking about facebook blocking and the SIMS.  Christ.  

Anyway, back to the original story… so Mercedes is now pretty much my arch nemesis and her and Gigi were headed up to Snoop-Linus’ neck of the woods last week for work.  On the way there Mercedes starts to tell Gigi about how Snoop-Linus has been calling and texting her on the reg trying to hang out with her, telling her if she’s ever up there to hit him up so they can go out and party, and basically putting in some phone time so that she’ll feel comfortable letting him get in her pants.  That’s how I took it anyway.  

Gigi being the pot-stirrer that she is, she instructs Mercedes to text Snoop-Linus and tell him she will be in town.  So she does and instead of texting her back he immediately calls her.  Mercedes answers and Gigi says the convo went down on speakerphone and Snoop was all, you should score us a hotel room and we can go out and get crunk (I am ashamed that I ever dated someone who talks like this) and then go back to the room after.  Mercedes was all, well I don’t know I have to work but I’ll let you know when I get off.  So that was that.  Then Gigi said on their way home Snoop was doing the crazy girl call and calling Mercedes like every 5 minutes trying to see if they were going to meet up.  Mercedes didn’t answer and Gigi informed her I was going to find out about this so to prepare herself for any lashings that might come her way.

Gigi told me and while yes it is typical of Snoop-Linus to do this and something new I can add to my list of shitty things he’s done to me, I can honestly say I don’t give a flying fuck.  They can hook up, get drunk, date, even get married, and have kids for all I care.  They’re both the scum of the earth and I want nothing to do with either of them ever again.  Shit, I even encourage this! Ex-boyfriend Scum of the Earth meet Ex-friend Scum of the Earth, now go have Scum of the Earth babies and rot in hell.

That whole incident didn’t anger me as much as it gave me the mindset of now I really need to get laid tonight so he is not the last person I slept with.  I went out with a mission, informed everyone we were with of my mission and had 8 extra eyes helping me scope the scene for hot men.

To be continued…

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,