Tag Archives: guys

Living Will: Name your best friend as your relationship power of attorney.

MmmmHALLO!!! Aloha and Mahalo! I’m back on the mainland and not psyched about it.  There’s snow on the ground and it sucks, it sucks donkey. 

The trip was nice and relaxing, of course I got annoyed with Stepdad more than once, but thankfully AT&T is aware that Hawaii is a state and has thoughtfully included it in their nationwide plan, so Lucky and I BBMed it up the whole time at no extra charge.

Which also means…drumroll please…badadadaaaa…. High School Crush and I texted the whole trip too.  During the months before the big Christmas extravaganza in Hawaii I was all… “Yeah I’m totally shutting off my phone and not taking my computer.  I’m disconnecting and it’s going to be awesome.” But you know what? Shit happens, December 16th happened, and I wouldn’t have been able to go 2 weeks without talking to Lucky either.

I was pleasantly surprised that HSC and I texted the whole time I was gone, and even more excited that he texted me right at midnight his time on New Years Eve to wish me a Happy New Year.  But as we know, all good things must come to an end.  We’re still talking. But after I got back, Lucky and I had a long talk about how the next step needs to happen.  We need to hang out again.

During our vacation text sesh HSC suggested that we get a group of friends together to go on a Vegas trip in March.  I mean, I’m all for it, but we need to hang out before that. Because what’s going to happen? We’re going to go to Vegas after seeing each other once in the past 5 years back in December with our BFF’s in tow, get drunk, and get married or some shit?  Plus, that’s at least 3 months away, oh and it will never happen. BUH!

So Lucky and I decided that I needed to try and make plans with him this weekend.  Wednesday night I asked what his plans were for the weekend.  He said he was staying in his city because he was sick of driving after the holidays. Which is understandable, BUT THIS IS OUR ONLY CHANCE BECAUSE SUNDAY I HAVE TO GO BACK TO THE BIG CITY WHICH IS MORE THAN 5 HOURS FROM HIS CITY WHY DOES HE NOT GET THIS?! I replied being all yeah it sucks you’re tired of driving because you need to come to hometown this weekend to hang, his response? “I know! We need to plan the Vegas trip.” At first, we (Lucky and I, because she is in this relationship just as much as I am and needed to be consulted) were pissed off at this response.  Because it’s lame.  We took it as him saying, “I know that it sucks that I’m sick of driving, but we need to plan the Vegas trip so we can hang out on that trip.”  Which in retrospect means, “See ya never loser.” 

Then I reread it and thought, well maybe he’s saying he knows that he needs to come to hometown so that we can plan the Vegas trip and we can hang out whilst planning the trip.  After a few minutes of analyzing, Lucky and I remembered our New Year’s resolution: To not give a flying fuck.  And with that I gave her power of attorney to tell me what to do with this situation, because clearly I like this guy and clearly he doesn’t like me enough to do anything but text me.  So it was a mutual agreement that I can give it until January 16th (MLK Jr. Day) because that’s a 3 day weekend and a good opportunity for both of us to find a way to meet up in some city between us.  And if it doesn’t happen by then? Well the ball is in his court and I will reply to his texts but will not initiate any conversation or mention hanging out or future plans and/or keep letting this shit consume my life. If you guys haven’t heard, letting guys consume your life is so out in 2012.

So that was that.  Then yesterday I woke up all sick and flu like and I was still annoyed at his lame response after I put myself out there. I decided that January 16th would be moved to January 6th.  We hung out once and have been texting for 3 weeks.  I realize I wasn’t in the continental US for 2 of those weeks, but still – if he was interested he’d drive the hour and come back this weekend to hang out, right?

I like him and if he likes me I shouldn’t have to wait 2 months for a faux Vegas trip to see him.  It could be easily argued that there hasn’t been a lot of communication in the “Hey I like you, do you like me also?” department and that’s why nothing has happened.  But we’ve been texting for 3 weeks – it’s kind of a given that we’re both at least semi-interested right? So yeah, I’m going to back off and maybe he’ll get that I was trying to make this happen (after 12 years) and it’s been 3 weeks and I’m already tired of the shit and if he is for realz interested he needs to ask me when we can see each other.  

So guys, we can mark this day as the end of High School Crush, because he won’t ask me to hang out.  And yeah, it sucks, but I can’t keep chasing 14 year old Gizzy’s dreams, 26 year old Gizzy needs to get some of her own and move on.  End chapter.

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Homeless Harriet

I hate everyone.  Like seriously.  I thought my life was starting to semi-get in order. I’ve been reading literary masterpieces so that I have intellectual things to talk about with Dr. Love, my car situation is finally under control, Lucky booked a flight to come here over her birthday/the fourth of July, I’m about to move into a room with not only 4 walls and a door, but a walk in closet with places to hang my clothes, AND a bathroom; life was good.  Then I get thrown under the bus like I’m invisible, yet again.  Right before the end of my work day yesterday I get this email from Anth:

To: Gizzy, Doogie

Subject: roommate

How do you guys feel about Tim moving in? He’s either moving in, getting a single, or getting a double with me he says.  I don’t see myself moving out so the last one probably can get tossed from the list.  He would pay the $900 for the bigger room and parking for sure.  Plus, he doesn’t do blow anymore.  So, score.  He’s probably going to come over Monday or Tuesday, whenever the next game is on to talk about it.

I was instantly fuming, texted Lucky that I would be calling her in 5 to vent, and got the hell out of work.  If you all remember when I moved up here I explained that I live in the den in the basement aka the dungeon, where it is cold, dark, and loud.  My bed is literally 2 feet from the furnace, air conditioning, the front door, and the garage door.  Not to mention anytime anyone makes any kind of noise in the living room or kitchen the noise in amplified in my room times 100.  So, when JM informed us he would be moving out memorial day weekend I was more than ecstatic to take over his room. Even if it did mean almost tripling what I pay now in rent.

Anth never really took my vow to move upstairs seriously, and asked me every other day if I was going to take over JM’s room when he moved out.  The answer was always a yes, without hesitation.  So it was quite a surprise to get this email 2 weeks before JM moves out, especially when we just talked the other day about how JM would forfeit his security deposit over to me so that he didn’t have to notify the landlord that he was moving out and have him come in and do an inspection and all that goodness.  Everything was all set, until this.  

Lucky and I kind of came to the conclusion that maybe he was trying to lock in a more permanent roommate since I had clearly stated from the beginning to them that if Lucky moves here, I am outro and living with her.  But, since that wouldn’t be for at least another 4 or 5 months I didn’t think looking for a replacement roommate was that big of an issue yet.  We had also decided that I shouldn’t reply to the email and I should confront him face to face when I got home, clearly this talk with Tim has been going on for a while and this was just the first I was hearing about it, Anth was obviously trying to be passive aggressive so he didn’t have to tell me I am getting the boot to my face.  While we’re on the phone Doogie replies to the email:

Yes. That’s awesome.  I see myself rocking out waaaaaaaay more hahahahaha

Really? I thought if anyone was going to have my back it would be Doogie since he is the most level headed one out of the bunch.  Clearly not.  So I get home from work, all fired up, stomp up the stairs in my stilettos and pencil skirt ready to go hammer on Anth, and of course this is THE ONE DAY he isn’t home when I get home.  And he doesn’t show up until 8pm at night, clearly to ensure everyone else is already home knowing I don’t want to be a drama queen and go off on him in front of everyone, I’m sure.

Anyway, when I saw he wasn’t home I decided I had no choice but to reply to the email because I couldn’t hold in my anger any longer:

So I don’t deserve 4 walls and a door anymore, asshole? I don’t even know who the fuck Tim is.

No reply.  Pretty typical, now he was scared.  Hence the not coming home until 8pm.  He walked in, we had a living room full of people and I immediately gave him the death glare.  He was able to put the subject off for a good 10-15 minutes until Doogie brought it up.  Anth looked at me and says, “Yeah, you don’t have to get so defensive, obviously the room is yours if you want it, I was just explaining all our options.”  Everyone stared at me for a response so I just repeated what the email said when Doogie’s girlfriend Patty chimed in, “Clearly Gizzy has paid her dues and deserves the room, YOU DICK!”  Thank you, Patty! Anth defends himself, “Well I just wanted to give you the choice since it’s a lot more expensive.” I just turned my head away to watch tv.  Bastard.

After I retreated to the dungeon for the night to go to bed I hear Doogie ask Anth, “So what’s the deal with Tim moving in?” to which Anth replied, “Well obviously if Gizzy wants the room it’s hers.  Tim could live downstairs but I really don’t think he’d be up for that.  So if he moved into JM’s room it would be cheaper for everyone.”

Well heres some news assholes, if Tim moves into JM’s room – Gizzy moves out! Ooohhh, now it’s more expensive for everyone and there will be no one around to buy things like dishsoap, papertowels, toilet paper, and trashbags, or to clean up after you filthy animals.  How ’bout them apples?  Assholes.

PLUS! And I quote, “He doesn’t do blow anymore.  So, score.”  Ummmmm… have fun tracking down your new 60 inch flat screen when that crack head sells it for drug money.  Idiots.  They’ll be sorry.

Reason # 17,834 why I HATE men.

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