In light of recent events if I see so much as a happy couple on tv – I get pissed off, change the channel, and feel like I need a beer with a shot of tequila in it. No, I don’t always get one, I’m not an alcoholic. Yet. So I was pretty delighted to see that facebook added yet another new feature where they highlight people’s relationships, engagements, and marriages so that you can congratulate the happy couple. Yep, there they are… right above the birthdays on the homepage.
What the fucking fuck balls Zuckerberg?
The best part is that it doesn’t go away the next day like the birthdays. It stays there, mocking you, for like a damn week. From the research I’ve done so far, I have figured out that there’s no way to turn this annoyance off completely. You just have to X out of each individual relationship as they come up. This might be the last straw for me with the facebook. It’s bad enough that everyone with kids turned it into Babybook, but now this?
Hey facebook, how about you get a feature for us singletons? Like a pop up, that shows up every time you log on telling everyone what awesome thing we did last night by ourselves. For example, when someone logged on it might pop up and be like *bloop* Lucky wrote 15 articles and made $1,000 while you sat at home staring at that dark speck in your kids buttcrack… IS it a mole with irregular boarders or is it just a fleck of leftover poop?
Anyway, I started my new job on Monday and so far so good! I don’t want to be all, OMG I LOVE IT SO MUCH! Because I think I said that when I started my last job. The fact is, work sucks, but the people at this place don’t seem to be so serious.
For example, Monday morning they kind of gave me the run around of their financial system, gave me a stack of files and had me get to work. In that process I was able to meet some people via email around the company. One lady in particular and I had to work through some issues with an account and yesterday afternoon I got this email from her:
Subject: The deed is done!
I walked in the sun both ways. Drops of sweat are dripping from my hair and face all over my silk blouse from Chico’s. I am going to sit here in my office, drinking cold water, until 3:30pm, with my fan 12″ from my whole body. All undergarments are soaked. It’s sickening. Diane signed it and handed it across the room to a person that works in the Controller’s Office, so I did not have to walk there as well. They were all in a meeting on the 4th floor.
I LOLed really hard at this for about 5 minutes. Mostly because earlier in the day this lady called me and was whining about how she didn’t want to walk across the company campus because she was wearing high heels, she’s probably 70 years old, so her description of the aftermath is pretty amusing. People at my old job wouldn’t have ever dared to send an email like this because they’re all boring. The email would have read: delivered.
Because this job came about so fast, I didn’t really have time to look for appropriate housing so I had to move back in with my old roommate (Mom). It’s not bad, my roommate is pretty much the coolest ever, so I have no complaints… but I am already anxious to get back out there on my own. I picked out living room furniture and everything. It’s plum. YEEE!!!!
AND in other news, am I the only loser that watches the new show on Nick @ Nite, Hollywood Heights? It’s pretty much the best show ever, and what makes it the best show ever is that it’s on every single night. So the longest you ever have to wait for a new episode is 2 days. And it doesn’t hurt that this hottie is the star…
I hate to admit that this show is what gets me through the day, but it’s true. You guys should check it out, and then tweet this guy and tell him he should marry me @codylongo Kthxbye.