As we concluded last time, I was with some of my friends in a different state, drunk, and we were being summoned by the police… (My life kind of really is like an episode of cops. Such shame.)
We approach the po-po and he immediately goes after the angry girl, accusing her of being loud and dramatic for no reason. He didn’t even see what happened with the whole rickshaw thing, but he was right. He told her to remove herself from the situation or he would arrest her. And off she went.
When we finally got a cab back to our Motel (it was as close to staying in a motel 6 as I ever want to get) and we all passed out because we had to be up in about, oh 4 hours, to start drinking again. Being in your 20’s is so rough.
When the morning came we were all dragging ass, but we made it to a bar and had our first beer in hand by 10am. At 11:30 I decided it was close enough to the afternoon for shots and off we went. The rest of the day was kind of a blurr, I remember eating a lot of fried cheese – which is disgusting, but we just kept ordering it.
At some point we made it to someone’s friend’s house where a bunch of PHd students were posted up. We came in, all drunk, with 2 cases of bud light and a package of meat hooting and hollering like a bunch of cavemen. It was gross. The rest of the time being at that house is kind of a blurr too, the next thing I know we’re all standing in the front yard mooning the people across the street and telling them they had AIDS. I know, I know.
Eventually we made it to another bar, where we drank dark beer and ate more fried cheese, played pool, and danced to Hanson. And we were the only ones acting this way. It was like a chill adult bar and I can’t believe we didn’t get kicked out. Here I am having a gay old time not giving a shit because the only people I know in this state are my friends.
THEN, these two girls approach us just about the time I’m getting ready to show everyone how good I am at freestyling…. “Gizzy???” Oh. Shit.
It was two of my sorority sisters, one of them lived in a nearby city and the other was visiting her for the weekend. They were at this bar, with their husbands, not being waste faces, and there I was being the single Gizzy they all knew and hated (for getting our house put on probation for hiring male strippers and buying a keg for my senior night) stuffing my face with fried goods and spilling drinks on myself – just like in college. Nothing has changed.
In college they were the type of girls that would drink but would never get too drunk. They were never out of control, never made fools of themselves, always had boyfriends because they were classy and collected. The non-alcoholics if you will. And I was the opposite.
Anyway, I bought us a shot to celebrate one of the girl’s birthdays and they were quick to rush me away after that when their husbands approached. Clearly they know the repercussions of me being drunk better than anyone. But you know what, who cares, like I told every bartender that weekend – “I’m on vacation so make it a double.”
After that everyone rushed up to me being all, “Omg Gizzy, did you know those girls? How awful. We are all shitfaced.” Yep, I know. Give me some cheese.
At 10:30pm and a mere 8 pitchers of dark 9% alcohol beer later none of us could stand and we had been cut off by our waitress. And there we were, back outside, playing the waiting game for a cab. We made it back and no sooner than I could get the key in the door my motel-mate for the weekend pushed passed me and went straight to vom in the toilet…. And she kept going, and going, and going… for the next 4 hours.
The next day we drove home, all hungover and wanting to die, I found a random half pound hot pocket in my bag that night and the rest is history. All in all it was a great trip and I’m really happy I went. So I’ll just leave it at that.
On next week’s episode of Gizzy is forever doomed to be single because she can’t get it together:
Gizzy takes a trip to another city to see old college friends/drink her face off.