Tag Archives: merica

The reasons behind the misery

Today is a good day.  Let me tell you why.

First, it’s Friday.  Friday’s are ALWAYS good.

Second, Ciggy Breath AND my boss are both out of the office today.  A-ching-ching!

Third, I am going back to hometown for the second 3 day weekend in a row.

The downside is that I have to come back to hell on Tuesday.

I don’t have much planned for the long weekend, Betty and I are going to hit up her pool with some brewskis Saturday afternoon.  And I’m going to hang out with High School Crush this weekend, in our hometown, probably high school style at one of our parent’s houses.  14 year old Gizzy is so envious of 27 year old Gizzy’s dating life right now!

Ok, real talk here, I need your help.  How can I politely tell Anth to stop being an annoying mother fucker in the mornings?  I realize that I live in an open room with no door and people have to walk past my area to leave our apartment.  I know I’m going to get woken up.  But, I feel like Anth doesn’t try to be quiet at all in the sense that he will run in and out of the house 10 times in the morning doing god knows what and slams the door when he leaves as hard as he can…. OR he leaves the door wide open for a solid 10 minutes.  Which also keeps me up, because I’m lying there thinking, “Ok, is he coming back? Should I get up and close the door? What if a robber comes in and kills me?”

The second thing he does is he moves the dishes around banging them on the counter as hard as he can without breaking them.  Don’t get me wrong here, he is not DOING the dishes, he’s just moving them from one spot on the counter to another.  A while back when I told a mutual friend of ours that Anth is the loudest person I’ve ever met he said, “Yeah I think he’s the type of person where if he’s up he thinks everyone should be and if you’re not up he wants you to know he is and he’s there.” Perfectly said.

My next complaint is about the fucking barbarian I am now living with, the guy from Alaska.  For whatever reason this guy creeps me out and just rubs me the wrong way.  I don’t like him.  Call me Judge Judy, but I am entitled to my closed minded opinion.

First off the guy does laundry every fucking day.  I just don’t understand how one person produces so many dirty clothes.  This annoys me because my room is in the laundry room so he’s constantly knocking on the wall outside of my room saying, “Gizzy? Can I jump in here and do some laundry?” Seriously, every fucking day.  At some point, maybe when I’m drunk, I’m going to snap back and be like “What the hell is wrong with you bro? Do you poop in your pants or something?” I just don’t get it. 

Second, Anth has met his match when it comes to being a disgusting slob.  This guy is worse. Not only does he produce more dirty dishes than he does clothes, he refuses to unload a dishwasher full of dishes that are 95% from him.  Instead, he fills up one side of the sink with water and piles his dishes in there, with food on them.  So by the time the dishwasher finally gets unloaded (when I do it) the water smells like dead people and there’s chunks of food floating around in it.  On that note, last night (after unloading the dishwasher) I found a dirty cutting board that had been conveniently placed BEHIND the toaster oven, with chunks of raw chicken still stuck to it.  Yep.  This is what I’m dealing with.  I won’t even get into how gross the buttons on the oven and microwave are because he fries everything he eats.

So anyway, now you all know the reasoning behind why I am miserable in my big city life.  I’m on the job hunt for a job near home town, but as I explained to lucky last night there just aren’t jobs out there.  I spend my evenings racking my brain trying to think of companies to apply to and once I get to their website there are no open jobs in finance.  Hrmph.  My plan, once I get a new job, is to go back to school.  Now I’m thinking that going back to school may be my only way out of the big shitty city.

But hey, Happy Memorial Day everyone…. Thank a soldier.



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