Tag Archives: movies

We’re getting married…to dudes!

That’s right, you read correctly, Me (Lucky) and my best pal Gizzy are finally getting hitched…and NOT to each other!

And so, like every other bride to be, there’s planning to be done, cakes to eat, parties to attend, registries to build, and of course, a wedding website to capture it all!  Wondering who the lucky gents are? Read and weep my friends…

Follow us on our newest journey: Lucky & Gizzy’s Fairytale Wedding

Happy Valentine’s/Single Awareness Day!

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Me, myself, and I

Seriously guys, I have got like cray dramaz going on in my life right now.  As you know from Tuesday’s post, my love life has taken a turn to my liking, but of course that can’t come without other aspects of my life taking a giant shit on my face.

Like I said on Tuesday, Betty changed her mind about 180 times trying to decide whether or not to go to the festival.  I really only invited her so that she wouldn’t get mad if she found out Polly and I went, and as soon as she said she couldn’t go I was all, “Oh that’s too bad. We’ll drink one for ya!” I knew that if Betty came, she would make her own agenda, even though I was the one that invited her, and we’d be playing by her rules the whole day, and IF she let me meet up with HSC she would be saying weird shit to him like she did at the Christmas party.  Normally, this is fine and I just go with it because it’s just me and what do I care? But not this time, HSC was involved and I didn’t want to get stuck at Betty’s playing Mommy.  I told Betty that since she had plans earlier that day she could just meet us at the festival, since this wasn’t the plan she had worked out in her head, she chose to ignore that.

When the time rolled around for her to meet us she was super salty. She was pissed that we didn’t call to flip flop the plans around so that they worked for her, pissed because we disappointed her daughter, pissed because we disappointed her, pissed because her BF canceled his plans to go to a club to watch the baby sleep, pissed because she would have to drive to meet us alone, pissed because she’d have to finagle the crowd alone, pissed because she was sober, pissed because she’s had a hard 2 weeks and didn’t need this added on top of it. Uhhhh HOLD. THE. MOTHER. EFFING. BUS. ONE. SECOND.  Scusie?  Did I not offer to take off work, drive 3 hours, and sit in the ghetto ass abortion clinic with you a few weeks ago? Did I not offer to come down the next day and have a movie night with you? Did I not say, “Call me if you need ANYTHING.  ANYTHING!”? And you’re going to throw it in my face because something didn’t go your way you big fucking cry baby? OH. NO. SHE. DIDN’T! I tell you what I’m pissed about, people being selfish.  It’s as simple as 1-2-3… The plan is this, you are invited, if you can’t make it, that is too bad.  End story.

I have spent the past 26 years of my life not being selfish (ok, I’ve probably been a little selfish, but not nearly as selfless as I’ve been when it comes to giving my stupid friends their way) and I’m done with it.  I’ve bent over backward for everyone else, and look at where I’m at? I’m alone and none of those selfish bastards are.  But damnit, I’m the sweetest, nicest person everyone knows, so why am I still alone? Because I do everything for everyone else and nothing for myself.  So, after much deliberation between Lucky and I (and somehelp from Lopez because Lucky has the same problem) her and I both decided that we needed to only do the things that we WANT to do.  And if other people get pissed in the process? Who cares! Fuck ‘em!

I should say that in the 12 or so years Betty and I have been friends I can’t think of 1 time when she’s really taken one for the team for me and done what I wanted to do.  Which is why you can probably count on 2 hands the number of times I have invited her to do things.  A PERFECT example is the Christmas party, I asked Betty to take one for the team as in, “Hey HSC is here, he wants to hang out, will you take one for the team and stay out?” As you know, she said yes, but we only stayed out another 45 minutes and she was blatantly yelling, “I wanna go home!!!!” within ear shot of HSC the whole time and inviting him to
sleep in her daughters bunk beds with me.  Making it awkward.  But me? Oh I’ve been there for 3 abortions, a divorce, a childbirth, multiple affairs, a bat shit crazy mom, her dad almost dying, and a cheating live in boyfriend. But you know not to keep tabs or anything, it’s cool if you can’t spend 2 hours of your life standing in a bar so that I can hang out with a guy I have liked since before I even knew you. NO BIG DEAL! I don’t ever need to be happy, I’ll just sit here chewing on my nails and I’ll be your go to person for the rest of my life.  I am here. to. serve. YOU!

So not giving a damn about Betty’s agenda and if I upset her kid was the first step to doing more things for me so that I can get what I want out of life.  The next came earlier this week when Betty texted me inviting HSC and I to go skiing with her and her boyfriend next Friday.  First, let me say, Betty only knows that I met up with him at the festival because I put a picture of us on facebook.  She doesn’t even know what happened.  Second, even if she did know what happened, hanging out once and making out in the street does not warrant a couple’s ski trip.  So I just replied telling her I already had plans that weekend and didn’t even address the HSC thing.  I just don’t want her to know any of the details because I don’t want her trying to play God by asking him to do things behind my back.

This is where I get really irritated.  You see, Betty does this with every guy I like/date.  Instead of asking, “Hey what happened with HSC this weekend?” and gauging the relationship from that, she assumes that he is my boyfriend, we made our anniversary the first day we met (6/1/1999), and we are looking at apartments this weekend to move in together.  Because that’s what she does.  It’s such a problem that even communicating with her won’t work, simply stating, “No Betty, we’re not there yet, we’re still talking”  wouldn’t fly.  If I would have said that, she would’ve taken it upon herself to send him a facebook message inviting him on the ski trip and saying to get me on board.  Then I would’ve gotten a text from him being like, “Uhhh yeah… Betty wants to go skiing?” And it would be weird, he’d never talk to me again, and I would drive to her house and kill her.

So the point to this 1200 word rant is that I’m always busy looking after my friend’s hot mess lives, and they’re all busy looking out for only themselves, who is looking out for me? No one.  Insert NEW New Year’s resolution: Be selfish and do only what YOU want.

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It started with a kiss

It’s here! The recap of my Saturday with High School Crush that you’ve all been waiting for!  If you kept up with the live twitter updates you already know a little bit of what happened, and if you didn’t and still want a spoiler – check da twitter! I’m only slightly embarrassed that I was having what may be known as the best night of my twenties and I was tweeting about it as it was happening.  It’s fine.

Now that it’s over and we actually hung out and I don’t have to worry about jinxing it, I can tell you the whole story of how our plans came to be. 

So, my friend Polly just moved back to our hometown from the coast so I had asked her if she wanted to join me in going to a festival on Saturday in our state’s capital, about 45 minutes away from our hometown, but a 3 hour drive for me.  She accepted and because Polly is also friends with Betty, I felt inclined to invite Betty along as well.  Betty had originally said she would go, then a few days later changed her mind because she had her daughter and the weather wasn’t going to be that nice.  At this point she invited Polly and I over to have a sleepover with her and her daughter after the festival.  Knowing Polly and I would be drinking heavily at the festival and also knowing Betty puts her kid in bed at 7 o’clock and there was no way we’d make it to her house to have a sleepover before that time I told her I’d check with Polly and get back to her.  Polly kind of laughed it off so I never really gave Betty an answer. 

At this point since we would be sans Betty and her kid I decided that I would see if High School Crush would be driving in for the festival, and he said he would come back for it and we could meet up.  Hooray!  A few days later Betty changed her plans again and said she would come to the festival and bring her live in dbag boyfriend and kid.  Really, I love Betty and her kid, the boyfriend I could take or leave, but the festival atmosphere wasn’t really kid friendly and Betty said she had plans earlier that day and would make it back to her house around 4.  I knew already this would be trouble.  The festival was about a 20 minute drive from Betty’s, parking would be a problem, so by the time we got down there and started enjoying it, it would easily be 5 o’clock, then we’d have to leave at 6 to put her kid to bed.  No thanks.  So I left it with Betty as just a, “Yeah just let us know when you get home and we can meet up.”  Not only would we have to wait around all day on Betty, but that would also mean HSC would have to hang out with her kid, which is weird for a dateish thing.  I’ll elaborate more on this later in the week, because it was like drama city with Betty all day/night on Saturday.

The day of the big event rolled around and Polly came to pick me up around 3:30.  I had already talked to High School Crush and he was at the festival with his friends ready to meet up.  Polly and I got there, saw a few things we wanted to see then headed to the bar to meet up with HSC. 

Seriously guys, I was so nervous.  Like I could’ve crapped out my stomach it was in so many knots.  At this point, I really didn’t know what us hanging out meant. I still wasn’t even sure if liked me in the way I like him, if he was just being polite and meeting up because we were both there, I didn’t even know if he told his friends that we had been talking.  When we approached the booth he was sitting in, he was with 5 other guys.  One of them saw me and said, “There’s Gizzy.” And the rest of the guys all shifted themselves around so that there was an open seat next to HSC.  I took that as though he had told them.

To make a long story short, we drank, we ate, we flirted, we drank some more, we held hands, we rode a mechanical bull, we flirted some more, we took pictures, and then it was time to leave.  Polly and I had one last attraction we wanted to see before we left the festival and his friends were ready to catch a cab back to their neighborhood.  I invited HSC to come with us to see what we wanted to see and he said ok, even though none of his friends wanted to come.  So he, Polly, and I all took off and we held hands the whole way there.  I know, it’s really childish that I’m excited about a little hand holding but it gave me butterflies, so I’m happy about it. 

After we saw the last thing I told him we’d walk him to where he needed to meet up with his friends to make sure he found them, and then we’d call for our ride.  As we were standing there, we noticed Polly talking to a group of cops (something she does on the reg) and HSC said he wasn’t going to make us walk any further, his friends were a block away so he’d be ok going on his own from there.  We gave each other a hug and he said we needed to make sure we hung out more, I agreed and then he leaned in and kissed me.  THAT’S RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE KISSED!!!!!

After a hot and heavy make out sesh in the middle of the street (so classy) he said we really needed to make sure we hung out more often and said that it sucked we lived far away from each other.  Then he started coming up with plans as to how we can see each other, “We can take the mega bus back and forth. Or meet halfway.” Then I chimed in, “Or we can drive.  It’s only 5 hours, it’s not that far.” “Yeah!” He said, “We can do this.”

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Free at last

Guess what day it is.  It’s the return of Douche Day!!! You know what that means, something happened with the man himself, Douchearoo.  Seriously, after all of the awful things that the ex Snoop-Linus did to me, I think I still hate Douchearoo more.  Because he just tries to be an asshole.

I was driving to work this morning, minding my own business, when I noticed a child’s toy chillin’ on the back of a semi.  I thought it was funny, because it was one of those alphabet caterpillars.  So I got as close as I could, took a picture, and posted it on facebook saying, “Aw some little kid lost its toy!” Not 2 minutes after, Douchearoo comments “The kid is an it?” Yeah asshole, IT is.  I didn’t see if it was a little boy or a little girl who left his or her toy on the back of this semi, and you know what else? With all the recent baby drama I like to call kid’s it.  So step off, you don’t know me! 

If anyone else would have made that comment I would’ve laughed and been like, “HA HA, yep, it is an IT!” But I think any other person that would have been jackass enough to think about leaving a comment like that would have concluded beforehand why I called the kid it.  Just for funsies let’s run through the scenarios of other words I could’ve used and why I didn’t:

1. Aw some little kid lost his or her toy

-No. This is facebook, not effing English class, I’m not going to sound like a tool.

Aw some little kid lost their toy

-Then his comment would’ve been, “Since when do kids multiply” or something just as pretentious.

It’s like I told Lucky, if he wants to be silent facebook friends, I am totally fine with that, but don’t comment on my shit! He would do things like this when we were together and it really got under my skin.  He didn’t do it to me so much as he would to others. But, it honestly made me mad that I was dating someone who preyed on the weaknesses of others so he could feel better about himself and try and make himself look cool.

But really, correcting people’s spelling and grammar is all he’s ever had.  He’s ugly, balding, and fat, so his feeble mind is all that he has going for him.  That’s not even saying much, because I think he has trouble holding entry level jobs.  As for me, well I’m just coming into my prime and I work at one of the best companies in the world in my industry.  So you know all of that has to make him feel really good about dumping me a few years ago, I sure am glad he did.

As much as I wanted to reply to the comment and tell him that he sucks and I hate him, I didn’t.  I deleted the picture, and deleted him as a friend.  I’m almost 27 years old and can’t be getting into facebook battles anymore. I also have to think about what I’ve got going on this weekend, the hangout with High School Crush, a public fight with my ex over facebook for all to see could easily ruin that.  How unattractive and trashy is it when people get in public fights over facebook and twitter? Ugh! I’m taking a classy approach in 2012.

I am happy to report that I am now no longer facebook friends with any of my ex-boyfriends.  I’m free!!!!

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I have major white girl problems

As you may or may not recall, a few weeks ago I was getting the crowd amped up for me to make a move on High School Crush.  I had it all planned out, I was going to text him to see what he was doing over the weekend and we were going to get some plans in action.  Because I wear the pants!

When I saw his college had a basketball game on that night I knew how I could start up the conversation, but it would only work if they lost. And they did, it was a sign from God! My plan was to text him that Friday and give him a hard time about his team losing. It would be a PERFECT way to start up the conversation again since we hadn’t talked in a week. 

That Friday morning I rolled into work a few minutes past 9, got myself set up for the morning and pulled out my phone to see that I had a text from HSC. I was pretty effing happy that I didn’t have to feel like a creep for texting him first. Maybe I was a little too excited, because I replied right back, within 15 minutes of his text. (Now Anth has told me that I made a mistake and should’ve waited at least 2 hours before I replied.) So I waited…

And waited..

And waited…

And I never got a reply back from him. My text wasn’t scandy in the least. But, I was cutting right to the chase by asking about his weekend work schedule. I didn’t know how long our texting convo would go on, so I couldn’t waste any time. Little did I know, I wouldn’t even get to ask what his plans were because he made it a sure fire point to cut that convo after the first effing text exchange.

After I didn’t get a reply all weekend I decided that after his team lost again over the weekend I would text him Monday evening and follow through with my original plan, to give him a hard time about his team. I need to point out that our college’s are big rivals and a few weeks prior he sent me the same type of message because my team didn’t even show up for the game. So we had pretty much the exact same conversation this time with opposite roles. I was on the phone with Lucky during the texting convo, when I got a brilliant idea to reply back to him saying, “Well you know, someone told me once that it’s hard to win on the road so blame that.” Which is what he had told me about my team when I told him not to rub it in that we suck. It was flirty, yet breezy, almost the perfect reply. Then Lucky says, “ADD A SMILEY WINK! That means you want to have sex.” And done.

That was nearly 2 weeks ago and I am happy to report we are still texting our little hearts out.  We’re just going to ignore that whole post I wrote about being done and letting him initiate everything.  As sad as it may be, it’s High School Crush, and as long as there is not a ring on his finger or mine, I’ll never be done.  

Now that everyone is up to speed, I can say that we have tentative plans to hang out this coming Saturday.  I’m not going to get my hopes up because there is a lot that could happen that could easily lead to us not hanging out.  And that’s all I’m going to say because I am way scared of jinxing it.  

To take the pressure off and to unjinx anything that will happen this week that will lead to Saturday not happening, I accepted an invitation to go on a date this Wednesday night with a guy I went to college with.  It’s just dinner and drinks, but I have Lucky to thank for the pressure relief.  She’s the one that encouraged me to go on the date to ease the tension with the HSC situation and I think it will do just that! 

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Oh, goodmorning!

So I dropped the ball a lil bitty today by not being able to crank out a post.  You know what? It’s okay though, because what I’m about to show you will totally make up for it.  

A few Saturday’s ago about 3am I was sleeping when I heard a text come through on my phone.  I smiled in my sleep because I WANTED it to be a drunken text from high school crush telling me he loved me.  Instead it was a from a number I didn’t recognize, and the body of the text said this:

If anyone knows this girl, or knows anyone who knows this girl, please apologize for me.  Clearly, at 3am she sent this out to who she thought would’ve been a late night booty call.  Unfortunately for her, I’m the one who received it, passed it around to all of my friends, and am now sharing it with the world.

Good day.

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Facebook Statuses From Last Night: Gizzy’s Cousins Edition

For all of eternity I have said that if I ever get married I will elope in a foreign country and invite only my parents, my husband’s parents, and Lucky.  Here are some examples of why:

I present to you each of my cousin’s most recent facebook statuses, plus a little commentary from me:

you think your so hick by the way you talk and what you wear.. news flash hun, clothes can be bought, and you clearly watch the guys too much.. you cant just be a hick after one summer, you should be your whole life.. you gotta live it not wear it.(: (No. No smiley face. First, like 15 people liked this status.  Second, yes the way you talk and what you wear is what makes you a hick. After that one summer I am assuming the individual she is referring to participated in hick like activities such as riding 4 wheelers, attending monster truck rallys, and wearing camouflage not for funsies but to hunt wild animals – as one must do these summer activities in order to be accepted into the coveted hick crowd, which my cousin is clearly a part of.  If you ask me, talking hick + dressing hick + participating in hick like activities = hick – but what would I know? I’m an outsider.)

The first nite we hang out we wrecked ur truck, went to jail u lost us job, ur license and got chared with endangering my life and u still want to be with me . I only have one question y? (Christ.)

just because you live in our state doesnt mean your a hilljack, just because you got a pair of boots doesnt mean your cool.. just because you drink mcdonalds sweet tea does not mean your not from the south.. (So like, what’s the effing deal with hilljacks and why would anyone in their right mind try to be one on purpose? Also, I’m confused in regards to the McDonalds sweet tea.  First, we are not from the south.  Second, did I miss the memo that it is only acceptable for Yankees to drink McDonalds sweet tea to prove to other disbelieving northers they are in fact from the north? It’s arguable that people all around the world drink McDonalds sweet tea everyday because not only is it good, but it is 1 dollar. Also, boots do make you cool…

…The club does not lie.)

ya right, like i really coulda said somethin, you wouldnt have heard me if a train was coming.. (??? I dont get it? This is the status of the mother of the two hick-wannabe haters so that kind of explains it.)

At home watchin tv (Someone actually liked this.)

Brad locked himself in the bathroom. Stuck for 1/2 hr. Chad was throwing a fit the whole time. Grandpa and grandma had to take the door off to get him out! Then they just sat in the floor hugging each other. Must be a twin thing……….(LOLZ!!!)

Heading back from lunch… Gonna be a good day… Cold day… But a goodern 🙂 (Maybe cousins 1 & 3 from above could direct their hilljack posing friends to this cousin for hilljack lessons.)

I got an infestion problem at the house today. So if anyone goes by my house don’t yell out immagration. There’s a crew of mexicans fixing my roof. (Le sigh.)

Ya know fightin in a basement offers a lot of difficulties.. #1 being your fightin in a basement!! (I’m not sure that I care to know what this is about.)

Apparently my mom can roll a joint out of a sugar packet and parsley flakes what can ur mom do? (Unfortunately, I was present for this.  On our cruise last year my aunt did indeed roll a joint out of a sugar packet and oregano, lit it, and pretended to smoke it. Her son is proud.)

To funny!! We are eating at taco bell, and the we will rock you song comes on. The part where they say ” you big disgrace” Riley yells out loud ” you biscuit case” lol I thought it was to funny not to share 🙂 (LOLZ^2!!)

Exactly one year ago today Kyle told me he loved me for the first time!! I love you!!! ❤ (Oh fuck off, you’re 19 you don’t know what love is.)

So, hey, happy Wednesday everyone – from my family to yours.
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