It happened. The Christmas gift of all Christmas gifts is placed upon my finger (actually it’s sitting in the box looking at me because I’m freaking out)…
That’s gonna be your white gold band, aquamarine stone there in the middle, and chocolate diamonds on the outside (do I sound like one of those fancy schmancy jewelers? No?), I know you’re all waiting for the big clincher, that my dad or sister got me this lovely piece of jewelry, but that would be incorrect. I actually got it from a guy, and that guy is…. *drumroll please*
I guess I have a little explaining to do. Most of you probably don’t remember who HOTTIE is, because he is an early character from the blog who only appeared in a few (10-12) posts in during our first few months. For those of you who wish to read up on your HOTTIE literature:
For those of you who don’t want to read the full HOTTIE run-down let me give you a short briefing,
HOTTIE is an ex-friend of my ex-boyfriend, thanks to me. We ran into each other on the street one day, made plans to hang out, dated most of this past summer, I met his parents, we planned a wedding and a family, I got drunk and laid down in his elevator, then accidently answered the phone and let my ex-boyfriend hear us chattin’ it up one night which caused a full on brawl, and HOTTIE never called me again, with good reason. Until recently.
About a month and a half ago I went to my alma mater to see my friends, we went out, I saw HOTTIE… this was the half post I wrote on it after it happened:
The last thing I remember was looking at my Ciroc Redberry bottle thinking that it was almost gone and it would probably be a good idea for me to stop, but I didn’t. Gigi informed me that once we arrived to the bar I immediately spotted HOTTIE and gave him the cold shoulder/ignored him for a solid 45 minutes until he brought over shots and won my heart again. My online banking statement informed me that I spent upwards of $80 at one bar. Since my phone died before I started drinking, these are the only types of evidence I have, my vagina informed me that we did not have sex. And HOTTIE informed me that I smooth talked him well enough to want to start talking to me again/not thinking I’m a lush (I know, HOW?) and to treat me to breakfast and some heavy texting. I won’t lie, I am quite excited I drank HOTTIE back into my life. He’s the only decent guy I’ve ever semi-dated, with the exception of the time he threw me under the bus, but everyone gets a freebie, I mean I did lay down half naked in his elevator and find mystery poop outside of my apt the following day. I think we’re even. But I also forgot until just this second that he’s 21. Damnit.
I was just watching Conan and Maroon 5 was performing when it occurred to me if I had to compare HOTTIE to anyone it would be Adam Levine:
I think everyone can see why the subject of losing HOTTIE MCHOTTERSON has been so troubling for me.
I haven’t seen HOTTIE since then but he calls and texts me every day. It didn’t really occur to me that anything was going on between us until he called me on Christmas eve and asked if I could come up Sunday for a holiday party some family friends were having. Mind you, HOTTIE lives about 3 hours away, so it was going to be quite a haul, he also lives 30 minutes from my new job so I figured I could kill two birds with one stone and go apartment hunting on Monday (which didn’t happen.) Then, he told me he bought me a Christmas present so I was definitely on board, because if there’s one thing I love, it’s presents. But, that meant I had to get him one. He had mentioned these new shoes that came out that he wanted so I got him those and pretty much won his heart all over again because duh, I’m the best.
I was talking to Lucky last night about how it is a little awkward, HOTTIE and I haven’t had the talk, I honestly thought it was going to be one of those types of relationships where I give him a call when I go to my alma mater to see my friends and we get drunk and make out, I was never expecting a ring. Even though I have complained to him for the past month about how no one buys me jewelry AND made him watch the Tiffany’s commercial with Neal Bledsoe (who BTW still has not confirmed my facebook friend request) in it about 25 times with me on the phone, I wasn’t expecting him to get me a ring. I honestly have no idea why this guy likes me. I mean I have decent boobs but that only goes so far.
But, when he handed me the bag I knew it was jewelry and I couldn’t decide whether to throw up or cry, thankfully I did neither, I just put it on my hand, said it was pretty and shiny, and waved it in front of his face, I basically have to ruin everything. We went to the party where his family and family friends were all dressed to the nines and his mom ran up and was all, “Ooooh let me see The Ring!” I’m like whoa whoa whoa, we did not just get engaged, this is a birthstone ring, and we have been talking a month and a half and he’s still only 21, this means he will most likely buy MANY many more rings. She blabbed on about how he was soooo excited to give it to me and could hardly contain himself. HOTTIE is cute, this melted my heart a little bit, such a wee young lad.
Now here I am, sitting here with this ring from this guy who I don’t know if he is my boyfriend or my MOB (make out buddy, another fun fact, we haven’t slept together yet.) And I’m not sure what to do. I can’t pawn it, right? I mean I like it, I don’t want to pawn it, but what if I get drunk and mess it up again? Soooo… yeah. Cheers to Christmas!