Tag Archives: nice guy

Dear Mr. Nice Guy…

Dear Mr. Nice Guy, 

Since I graduated from college about 5 years ago, I’ve found it’s difficult to meet a good guy to date. I would like to try online dating, but am clueless on where/how to begin. I’ve heard putting things on your online profile can be taken the wrong way, or posting certain pictures of yourself can send the guy the wrong message. What are some tips for creating an online profile that represents me and how do I avoid getting pranked, Manti Te’o-style?
 
Sincerely, 
 
Miss Online Hopeful  
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HeadshotDear Online Hopeful,

You. Are. In. Luck!
In some circles one could consider me an expert on most things related to the topic of Online Dating. Much to my dismay this could largely be due to the fact that I am one year shy of reaching the decade mark for being an on-again/off-again part of that world.
But my pain is your gain, and the reason I’m here is to help you, which is what’s really important.
You are asking the question I wish more people would ask. You don’t really need to know what you should put in your profile, but what you should not put in it.
We’ll begin with your pictures because, let’s be honest, this is going to be the very first thing anyone is going to see and the ultimate deciding factor as to whether they will continue on to read your profile or not. Taking into consideration that you’re looking for a guy to date, and not just for a good roll-in-the-sack, here are my thoughts on the type of profile pictures you should avoid.
Avoid the dreaded “selfie” or mirror picture. What’s a selfie you ask? A selfie is a picture you took yourself by turnings your phone/camera towards yourself and stretching out your arm. I imagine you have at least one friend. Have them take the picture. This way you’ll also be able to better avoid getting a downward angle and therefore placing more focus on your possible cleavage.
Speaking of cleavage, be aware of what you’re wearing in your pictures. There is a difference between looking hot and looking down-right slutty. You may look extremely cute in your short shorts and tank top but giving us an idea this early on about what you may sleep in can put across the wrong message. In short, if your grandma wouldn’t frame the picture to show off to her bridge club you probably shouldn’t up. (all grandmas reserve the right to change their opinion at any time)
 
When it comes to the actual text of your profile I really only have one rule. Your profile is not a place to vent any of the following emotions: anger, rage, jealousy, insecurity, or bitterness. This is a place to sell you. We all have pasts and that’s where they should remain. Tell us [men] about the present day you and (indirectly) why we want date you.
There have been times I would come across a profile that seemed to have it all. Cute pictures. Personality. Common Interests. Then my scrolling would lead me to a list of “conditions”, or deal breakers, explaining that if any of the following were to apply to me then I shouldn’t bother. My urge to send a pleasant introduction message completely dissolved almost immediately. There is not problem in having standards, but you don’t know who is out there, and all you’re doing here is driving away someone who could actually be “perfect” for you. Remember, there’s a difference between having reasonable needs and being petty. Rejecting a guy with anger issues = reasonable; rejecting a guy because of thinning hair = petty.
Overall, have fun with your profile. Don’t take yourself too seriously. But most of all be honest.
Embrace who you are and others will too.
Good luck, and be patient. Online Dating is still a relatively new ballgame in realm of dating so having hot, and cold, streaks is expected. Don’t get frustrated and hopefully your right guy will send a virtual wink to you across the world wide web.
Best,
-Matthew; aka Mr. Nice Guy

Got a question for Mr. Nice Guy? Email it to cocktailsattiffanys@gmail.com 

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Nice Guy’s fave NYE cliches!

Nice Guy is baaaack, which is a good thing since I hate NYE… so here you all go!

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Every year December 31st is the most anticipated night that, as we get older, holds the greatest potential to be an epic letdown.

 

Happy New Year’s Eve!

 

Tonight is the night we put 364 days behind us and projections are made for the next 365 to come. On this night we hold on tight to traditions; traditions that rarely change from year to year but we expect the results of the following year to be different. You what else has a definition like that? Insanity.

 

So, here are my Top Ten Insane New Year’s Eve Traditions!

 

10.) Singing ‘Auld Lang Syne’: Seriously, how many of us know the words? How many of us actually know what the meaning of the song is (without Googling it)? However, I’m a sentimentalist and therefore I had to put this at 10 because it does date back to the 1700’s. Respect.

 

9.) Counting down, out loud, to midnight: If you’re in a situation where you won’t look ridiculous doing this (because you’re alone), then you’ve probably had enough to drink that you probably wouldn’t be able to pass the sobriety test administered when you get pulled over driving home later on. *we do not condone drinking and driving. Be smart. Be safe. “The more you know.”*

 

8.) Limos: I’ll only really concede to this if your driver’s name is Ranjit and you have a ‘Get Psyched’ mix CD to get everyone ready to party. Otherwise, just save your money and use regular means of public transportation is necessary.

 

7.) Father Time/Baby New Year costumes/photos: Just…don’t.

 

6.) Toasts: This may be fine in a small, intimate setting with close friends and loved ones. If you’re out and about at a public party no one wants to hear you being all sentimental about the last year. It’s like trying to sing a love ballad (or almost any slow song) at a karaoke night. People want to ROCK, not think about a love once lost. Speaking of being out in the world…

 

5.) Public New Year’s Eve menus and parties: Strange phrasing, I know but hear me out. Restaurants, clubs and bars all have these big end-of-the-year blow out parties and specials. Want to know what’s so special about them? You’ll be paying close to 30-50% more for it. Cover charges at the door that used to be $5 are not $20. “Special” dinner items are $50 a plate, when on any other night are part of a 2 for $20 entree deal.

 

4.) Staying up until midnight: You know what? I’m old…ish. If I’m tired, I want to sleep. If I happen to get tired on New Year’s Eve, I’ll still probably want to sleep. It’ll still be the new year when I wake up.

 

3.) Champagne/ungodly amounts of booze: I love champagne. If you offer it to me I’m going to have a glass, or two, or three. But why drop that kind of money (because you are not going to disrespect New Year’s Eve with a $20 bottle are you?) on a night that shares a definition withINSANITY? As for the rest of the booze? Honestly just be safe; whether you go out or stay in. No one likes the stupidly drunk. In most cases you don’t need it to have a great time.

 

One of my best New Year’s Eves happens to have been during my high school years. I, along with 3 other friends, decided to attempt the ‘Drink 1 Gallon of Milk in One Hour Challenge’. I “won” by only having about 8 oz. left by the time the hour was up. Overall none of us “won”, but breakfast at Village Inn the following morning never tasted so good…once the floor stopped moving.

 

However, on the reverse end when you CAN drink it’s difficult to go without even one drink to help celebrate. While living in LA I dated a girl who ended up taking me to an AA sponsored New Year’s Eve party. Nuf said.

 

2.) Kiss at midnight: Just another reminder to anyone who is not with someone that they are alone…and better yet you’re alone at the beginning of the new year. Congrats. Go make out with that bottle of gin. The icing on the cake is that in about 6 weeks you’ll get another reminder that you’re still single.

 

1.) Resolutions: Yes, the yearly promises we make that survive perhaps one, maybe two months, if even that. As ‘The Lion King’ taught me there is then a circle of life…which in that case means you’ll end up making the same resolutions the following year, and the year after that, and the year after that.

 

The way I see it these come in various levels:

 

Level One are the actual realistic ones that are at the complete control of the person: drink less, get in better shape, quit smoking, save more money, spend more time with friends or family. Again, we have control over these things. Want to get in better shape, join a gym. Want to drink less, don’t keep as much in the house. Want to save money, actually prepare a budget.

 

Then there are the Level Two resolutions that people make that they don’t have control over, or at least complete control over. I’m willing to wager that the most common one is to either fall in love and/or get married. It’s like saying you’re going to be married by 25. Then 27. Then 30. Then 32. Stop setting yourself up like that. This requires two people. Love is a two way street, unless you’re a fan of restraining orders. Don’t resolve to fall in love. We don’t have the sort of control. A close second is probably finding a new job. Again the only control you really have is quitting your current job. You can take steps to then make yourself look appealing to other employers but in the end…they make that final decision.

 

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I have one Level One resolution on the table: to eat better (again) and work on some otherwise lacking areas of my own personal fitness. Perhaps I’ll even try to do a little more reading considering there are some books on my shelf a couple of years old that haven’t been cracked open yet.

 

What are you all resolving for 2013?

 

As a New Years treat, from me to you all, here’s something I look forward to every year around this time…end-of-the-year mash-ups!

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=If5MF4wm1T8&feature=share&list=FLTlBSQLJP_KVrX-Zi5PEIqA

 

See you in 2013!

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This one’s for the singletons.

HEY YO, it’s Friday. Friday before Christmas, and I’m Jolly as hell, if that’s possible. Because I’m so cheerful, I’ve got a treat for ya! Resident Nice Guy Matthew wrote a lil somethin’ somethin’ to warm your hearts just in time for St. Nick’s visit. Enjoy!

Being single this time of year sucks.

I’m not speaking just in terms of Christmas and New Years. I’m talking December, I’m talking winter, I’m talking when it has the potential of getting cold enough (at least here in Kansas) to make you want to wet yourself to stay warm. Maybe it would more appropriate for me to say being single from about late November to late March really sucks. However, since Christmas is merely a short number of days away let’s keep this timely shall we?
During this time of year there is one particular type of person you do not want to be; a hopeless, old-fashioned, romantic. A person like this isn’t necessarily lost between the realms of reality and fantasy. This is the type of person who holds on to the belief that if you truly want the love-story-of-all-love-stories it’s up to you to make it happen. Do you know anyone like this? If not, please allow me to introduce you to one so you aren’t lost as you continue to read on.
 
Hi. It’s a pleasure to meet you.
 
It is my most humbled opinion that around this time every year my brain becomes hard-wired for having someone special in my life. Let me paint you a [word] picture (if anything, because I studied art for nearly a decade and I would hate to let those fine-crafted skills go to waste):
 
Our Story Begins…
 
On this particular imaginary December Saturday evening it is bitterly cold and snowing. Inside of the apartment one can hear Michael Buble singing ‘All I Want For Christmas Is You’; (Editor’s note: here, allow me  
…while from the kitchen two other voices can be heard laughing and singing along. While I am busy adding a secret ingredient (Rum Chata) to a couple cups of hot cocoa, [insert name of woman I should be dating] is plating our Chinese take-out. Carrying our respected dishes of the perfect “snowed in” meal we head to the living room where the fireplace has already been turned on to provide a combination of ambiance and warmth. As we both settle onto my freakishly awesome couch we begin the first Christmas movie planned for our holiday marathon.
 
Now, in the ideal situation I’ll be lucky enough to find a woman who will appreciate (tolerate) some of my unique choices in Christmas movies; such as Gremlins and Die Hard. However, other choices would consist of classics such as Holiday Inn andWhite Christmas; comedies like Christmas Vacation and Home Alone; to the more serious plot lines of Serendipity and The Family Stone. Regardless of what we watch, once we’ve finished eating she curls up in my arms and we cuddle under a fleece blanket. 
 
As the credits begin to roll on the second film I get up indicating that I’ll take the dog(s) out for a quick walk. While I’m securing my hoodie, before putting on the next layer, she begins taking care of our dinner mess because we’re awesome and believe in that teamwork thing. By the time I return she’s not only changed into some sweats, and that t-shirt of mine that looks oh-so-good on her, but she’s also poured a couple glasses of wine. Obviously no movie marathon is complete without popcorn. I remove a pot from a lower cabinet, pour in some olive oil, and switch on a burner. Don’t act so surprised that I didn’t just throw a bag into the microwave and hit the ‘popcorn’ button. You have to respect your food and make it with such respect. By the time I return to the couch I’m carrying a tub of popcorn with the perfect proportions of cheddar, and kettle corn, seasoning with a hint of melted butter. 
 
The credits are now nearly complete on the third film. The popcorn has been, more-or-less, devoured. Our wine glasses sit together, empty, on the floor. Glancing through the balcony door she notices that the snow is now tranquilly falling to the ground and recommends that we sit outside to enjoy it for a bit. I make a comment on how cold it is (below freezing). She counters by saying we can share a seat under one blanket, and bring out the remaining half-bottle of wine. I agree without hesitation.
 
The view from the balcony consists of a blanketed white landscape lit by a series of street lights running along side the street and strings of Christmas lights on neighing apartment buildings. After taking a pull from the wine bottle she nestles her head on my shoulder and hands it to me. After taking a swig myself I let out a relaxing sigh. She turns her head towards me, smiles, gives me a kiss on the neck, and lets out her own happy sigh. Four minutes total go by before she says she’s too cold and wants to go back inside.
 
At speeds that would even challenge The Flash she rushes into the apartment, slides the glass door shut and by the time I’m standing and facing the door, she locks it. Calmly standing in the cool elements I give her that “Really?” look we’re all familiar with. She stands there with the largest childish grin. It’s a great grin. How can I not like this woman? I try pleading with her. I try bribing her with promises. She doesn’t budge. At this point my ears are as red as Rudolph’s nose. Time has come to play the card that has a success rate of 83%. Puppy. Dog. Eyes. She says I’m not playing fair. This time I don’t budge until she finally cracks and unlocks the door. 
 
By the time my shoes have been removed, and I’m sliding the balcony door shut, she has found a place to sit directly in front of the fireplace. Her hand pats the ground next to her while she gives me an over-exaggerated come hither look. I point at myself pretending to ask her non-verbally, “Me?”, and look over both of my shoulders. Shrugging said shoulders, I slowly make my way over with hands deep in my pockets pretending to be extremely embarrassed but flattered. We both snicker as I sit down next to her. She looks at my still red ears and genuinely feels bad for her joke. Looking into my eyes she makes cups with both of her hands and holds them over my ears.  
 
We realize just how big of dorks we are. It works. I become lost in a trance as I watch the flicker of light from the fire reflect in her eyes. I can’t help notice just how beautiful she is. She returns with a look like she has just read my mind and knows I just called her beautiful.
 
 
Is that a vivid enough picture? 
 
This is how my mind works. That’s why is sucks to be me, during the holidays, and single. I’ll be completely honest with you and admit that it can be a bit of a downer from time to time. It isn’t a lonely feeling. I’m not lonely. I am fortunate enough to have incredible people in my life. I live in a city where I have close friends, and even family, anywhere between 5 to 25 minutes away. There are even more close friends, and again family, only a mere phone call away. Then thanks to the powers of technology there are friends who are a mere key stroke away. It would be virtually impossible, and illogical, for me to even try and convince myself that I was alone. I’m never alone. 
 
The present situation is, more or less, just frustrating. It’s frustrating because there’s so much inside that just wants to burst out. 
 
So let me say it again, being single this time of year sucks. 
 
Do I need someone in my life to make me happy, to make things feel complete? No.
 
But it sure as hell would be nice to have someone special to share all of this with. 
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Mr. Nice Guy

It’s Thursday, which means it’s one step closer to the weekend that I know everyone is ready for. Gizzy and I have been wanting to ask our blog crush, Inside the Nice Guy, to write a guest blog forever (foreva-eva), but I get the vibe that guest blogs don’t fly with you beloveds.

So, we decided to do a Q & A with Mr. Nice Guy instead—and by Q & A, we grilled him and tried to get to the bottom of this supposed “Nice Guy” thing he’s got going on. How long should we wait to sleep with a new guy? What’s appropriate to wear on a first date? How will Nice Guy propose to his future bride? We’ve got it all:

1. What are, in your opinion, the characteristics that make up a “nice guy”?

To be frankly honest that’s difficult for me to answer, within the limits of my own personal opinion, since the “nice guy” label was more-so given to me rather than being self-imposed. I suppose some traits could be a combination of being genuine, having a properly calibrated moral/ethical compass, compassionate/empathetic *translated to often thinking of others*, honesty and integrity. Truthfully, I think a lot of it bears down to just making the right choices.

2. Can you think of any celebrities that fit into the “nice guy” category?

As much as he plays a friggin’ bad-ass in most of his movies, the guy who comes to my mind immediately is Hugh Jackman. Anything that I read holds him to this incredibly high regard by those who know him and work with him. Additionally, I often hear about his wife (and kids) which we all know a loyal, strong family relationship is relatively rare in the world of Hollywood *though not completely unheard of*.

3. What are your deal breakers?

This could very well end up being one of my easiest answers. I’m pretty open-minded and realize that people have a past and make choices *I’m far from perfect* One definite deal breaker would be if they were a current drug user. Having experimented once or twice before, that’s fine. If you regularly roll up a fatty, light up a bowl, inject or sniff anything or mix your own “mickey” odds are we aren’t going to work out. That’s probably the most conservative thing about me. Don’t like drugs, of any type, and really see no purpose for them outside of medical reasons.

Also, it would be nice if she didn’t like/have a cat(s). I’m allergic and more of a dog person.

4. What things do you find most attractive in a woman?

I could just say an alluring pair of eyes, and a killer smile, but leaving it at that would be boarder-line lame. In the same light of physicality, I am absolutely drawn to a woman with a great back and shoulders. Don’t ask me where that comes from, it just drives me wild. A natural look. Casual even. Basic make-up. T-shirt. Jean/shorts/skirt. Comfy shoes. Maybe even a ball cap.

In a non-physical sense I like a good combination of confidence and humility. Sarcasm but the ability to laugh at one-self. Ambition and drive. Nothing is sexier than a woman who knows who she is, has the strength to look the world in the eyes and say “Eff you”, but have moments of vulnerability to admit when she needs help.

5. What do you think is appropriate for a girl to wear on a first date?

That completely depends on what the first date consists of. Just be comfortable. If you’re comfortable, it will show and therefore we’ll be comfortable too. Plus, we’re there to see who you are…though you may want us to see only what you want us to see.

6. Do you think men eventually become “nice guys” or they either are or they aren’t?

I think a guy can become a nice guy as equally as a nice guy has the chance to become a complete dick. The thing is the longer the person is a particular way the more likely this type of “personality” is going to become further rooted into making them who they are. Around my freshman year of high school I became friends with a guy, we’ll call him Pretty Eyes *a nickname my mom and sister gave him*. He and I were basically polar opposites in many regards, particularly when it came to women. He had game. I did not. He had women virtually fawning over him. I had women telling me “I see you just as a friend.” The strange thing was that any time he and I were hanging out; we caused an imbalance in the other. I became more confident. He became less of a douche.

7. If a woman approaches you in a bar, or another setting, is that too forward?

Um…hell no! We guys like to be sought out too and nothing is more flattering (and attractive) than a woman who is willing to put herself in the typical guy vulnerability shoes and take a chance on possible rejection. Here’s a tip. If you and some guy are exchanging glances from across a room, or having little conversational quips here and there, and it is all but obvious you both are digging on the other but he’s not making a “move”…step up. Odds are we’re intimidated by your beauty, confidence, energy, etc. We are our own worst enemy. Are you sending what seem to be clear-cut signals and he’s not acting on it? We can be pretty dense and anything less than asking for our number *or giving us yours* will probably fly right over our head.

8. What are your rules in dating? i.e., who pays for the first few dates? Who plans the dates? When do you set up the second date, etc.

No sex in the champagne room. Oh wait…rules of dating. My bad. I was thinking about something else. No matter who asks who out for the first few dates the guy pays. Hands down. However, there is some bending room. Any guy is going to appreciate a woman who offers to pay. If the guy is anything worth his salt he will politely decline. Should she persist, he will continue the volley saying he’s got it. Now, should she persist a third time a compromise may be optioned. There are a couple ways this could go. If the two of you are going to do something else (say you’re at dinner and plan on going to a movie) one person could pick up dinner and the other could pick up the movie tickets (and any concessions). My favorite is say, “Let me get this one and you can get the next one.” *long pause*. “Maybe.” Smile and wink. *only wink if you can do it without looking creepy* Okay, maybe don’t smile and wink. Do what works best for you to come off cute and coy. The abridged version of my rambling is: Guy = pays for the first few (if he can get away with it). After a repore’ has been established then ‘who-did-the-asking’ should pick up the tab. Or, in some cases these days alternating who picks it up. Sort of a play on going Dutch.

One final note on this. Never. Ever. Never keep “score” on how many times you’ve paid for something and/or how much. Everything will “even” out one way or another. Plus, with the right person money simply doesn’t/shouldn’t matter. Another final note. Try not to think about it and if you feel you are spending too much, or going out too much, then tell the person *assuming the two of you are now going out with each other on a frequent basis* Over-thinking about who is going to pay is going to be as awkward as watching an old man do an Irish Jig in a tutu while singing ‘Old Man River’. It’s better to just avoid it.

9. Do you believe in soul mates?

Not really. At least not in just one soul mate. The numbers simply aren’t there. I do believe that there are those you are destined to meet. It is part timing and part who you are at the time when you meet. Our personalities are in a constant state of shift. Who you were last year may not be the case now. Boiling down to how well the two of you compliment the other and don’t hinder the others growth (and development) but add to it, feed it and encourage it.

10. How do you drink your coffee?

Strong. Dark. Preferably iced. And with a little cream. And when I say cream I don’t mean any of that powdered or non-dairy crap. Half ‘n Half or Whole Milk that sucker, on occasion get me one of those flavored Café’ Delight things in the dairy section.

11. When do you think is a good time for a girl to give it up (i.e, after 2 weeks of dating, a month, when you’re in a relationship exclusively, etc..) so that the guy remains “nice” and still respects her and doesn’t try to hump and dump?

I don’t think I’m really the right guy to be asked this question, simply because I’ve never been casual when it comes to sex. Never had a one-night-stand. No hump and dump. Nor a sexual fling. Any woman I’ve had sex with, I’ve been in/ended up in a relationship with…long enough where “I love you’s” were exchanged. The best advice I can think to offer would be to pay attention to what the guy does, not what he says. How does he treat you? How does he treat others? Learn to observe things when he may not think you’re not attentive. I’m not saying to spy on him…just be aware.

12. How will we know if a guy is really a “nice guy” or if he is just faking it to get in our pants?

This kind of ties in with my answer above to #11. A great recommendation in this regard, go on at least one date where some friends are with you. A group date. Then, get their opinion. Friends are able to see things that we may not clearly see while dating.

13. How often would YOU say the average male thinks of sex nice guys included?

Are we looking for a daily average or an hourly average? It’s difficult to keep count because, at times, those thoughts come and go as naturally as breathing. I would guess anywhere between 4 to 12 times a day. Some days may be higher than others. External factors could play in causing a shift in the frequency. It’s not an exact science but I would feel safe in saying that even on a guys worst day. WORST day. He will still think about sex once or twice.

14. Why do you think people always say “Nice guys finish last”?

Because of Green Day’s Nimrod album. Growing up, nice guys did finish last. At least I always did. I always got the ‘friends’ line from girls I was interested in. And those who did like me, I was my own worst enemy when it came to confidence and making a move. Therefore, the opportunity would be lost. The greatest hurdle a nice guy has to overcome is himself. Fortunately, as we get older, women begin to get tired of the bad boy and want someone they can take home, feel safe with and build a future with. Cue the nice guy. We are basically what most women have always been looking for, they just took a while to realize it. I no longer really look at it as ‘finishing last’ but the nice guy finishes best. Consider a marathon. You could push yourself to go as fast as you can for those 26.2 miles but at the end of the run you are going to feel like getting bisected by farming equipment. Instead, concentrate not on time but simply finishing. Break that finisher tape at your own pace, the way you want to, and you’ll feel great. And it’s all worth it. 15. Who is your dream celebrity woman and why? During high school I would have said Sarah Michelle Gellar because dating a vampire slayer would have proven monsters are real. In college, Kirsten Dunst because I grew up in a comic book store and always wanted to date Mary Jane Watson. These days. Scarlett Johansson. I’ve always loved her voice. Plus, A Love Song for Bobby Long. Awwwwwwesome.

16. Why do guys always talk about their exes on dates?

That’s a very good question and I wish I knew the answer to that. However, having never been on a date with a guy I can’t confirm, nor deny, that a guy always talks about his ex on a date. I do not speak about any of my exes unless asked, or I may briefly mention one if a conversational topic leads me to quickly make a reference and then continue on to something else. In contrast, I have encountered some women who would talk about their exes *a lot* on dates I’ve been on. And I would agree…why? Yes, I like to learn about you but I could really care less about those guys.

17. What subjects do you think should be off limits on dates?

Without question, past relationships. No one wants to hear how great (or horrible) a past relationship was on the first date. Should more dates come in the future you can slowly work in some details here and there, but diving into the others past should be saved for when you are exclusively together. Otherwise, I’m kind of a fan of candid conversation regardless of the topic. Religion. Politics. Belief in an alternate universe. It’s all good to me unless asking my advice on how to dispose of a body-shaped rug currently smelling up the trunk of your car. Just use your own judgment when it comes to date subjects. If you are extremely passionate about your political views, animal testing, woman’s suffrage and an opposite opinion/view point could set you off it is probably in your best interest to keep conversation to lower key items like board games, favorite junk food and where squirrels like to hide their nuts.

18. If a girl you were considering marrying told you she didn’t think she could have children what would you do? (This is a huge fear of mine as I get older and my biological clock continues to tick.)

That isn’t really a big deal to me what-so-ever. However, that it because I’m currently sitting on the fence as to whether or not I even want children myself. Don’t get me wrong, I love kids. I adore my niece and nephew. And my stance on kids has even perplexed my girlfriend because of how good I am with them and how I love the two of them so unconditionally. And how’s this for eff’d up? Here I am, uncertain on creating my own spawn but at the same time I believe *with the utmost confidence* that I would be a brilliant father and it would probably be the thing I’m best at *aside from being a killer boyfriend/husband ;)* However, I truly loved this girl. If there was no doubt in my mind that I wanted her to be forever introduced to others as “my wife ______” then that would not be a deal breaker at all. So we can’t have our own kids. No big. There are plenty of children here that don’t have parents, or a family of their own. Plus, now you can have all the sex you want without the worry of accidentally getting pregnant before the two of you are ready to have kids.

19. How do you think you will propose to your future wife?

The exact way can’t really be spelled out, because when the time comes it will likely be built on things/places from our relationship. If she likes karaoke, maybe I’d sing one of her favorite songs and then keep the mic and ask the audience for just a moment. Maybe we’ll go to a place that has a specific significance to us (or me, or her) from the relationship. Where we said I love you for the first time. First kiss. Where I realized I wanted to marry her. Don’t mistake this that proposals need to be a mind-blowing event. Sure, it would be great to pull off one like the guy who filmed the faux-trailer that played before a viewing of ‘Fast Five’ at a local theatre *if you haven’t seen this yet you don’t spend enough time on YouTube*. Or, consider the guy who wrote ‘How I Met Your Mother’ and got he (and his then girlfriend now fiancé) roles as extras during the first season finale where he proposed to her during the taping. Regardless, the act of how it is done does not matter as much as the girl you are asking the question to. To quote another favorite show of mine when the show’s title character is trying to propose to his girlfriend, “Forget about the balcony Bartowski. All you need is the girl.”

20. Why do men cheat (some “Nice Guys” do it too!)?

This is something I honestly, whole- heartedly, wish I knew the answer to, or were able to provide even a glimmer of light as to the ever-elusive ‘why’. I’ve never understood cheating. My person philosophy on cheating is; if you feel the need to cheat on someone you’re in a relationship with then you shouldn’t be in that relationship to begin with. I hear people cheat for a number of reasons (boredom, routine, fell out of love, thrill, something new, etc.) Frankly, to me it’s all bullshit. You cheat, you’re weak. If you get caught, you deserve it. If you don’t get caught…well…shit flows down stream just like everything else.

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