Tag Archives: social media

5. What are your 5 biggest fears and why?

LUCKY
    1. Living/dying alone. I think you all probably know this one. And I’m not really sure WHY I’m terrified of living the rest of my life, and ultimately dying, alone…I guess it’s human nature to want to couple up and be together, right?
    2. Masks. This is why I hate Halloween. This isn’t just a, “Oh I don’t like masks” thing. I’m terrified of them. Like it’s not even funny to me. According to my mom, I’ve hated them always, and I think it’s just a constant fear of not knowing who people truly are.
    3. Not reaching my dreams. Like most people, my dreams have changed a lot over the years. I’m still not sure what exactly they are. But I know I want to stay writing and stay creating and I hope one day, doing that will pay my bills, in  a way that I’m never feeling like I have to “work.”
    4. Being bitter. I know I’ve been hurt a lot in my past and I’m still working to move past it. But if I have to be single forever, I at least hope I can be a pleasant, happy person to be around and not bitter and jealous.
    5. Complacency. This kind of goes with #3, but a lot of my coworkers have just let their brains turn to mush and I’m terrified of that. I’m always trying to stay on top of things and stay creative so that I’m never complacent.

GIZZY

Losing my parents, dying, going blind, spiders, and snakes. BOOM next question. Oh right, I have to tell you why. Alright here goes…

1. Losing my parents. I’ve heard people use this exact phrase on Dr. Phil and Opera about a million times, but it really sums it up.  I don’t know how to live in a World where my parents don’t. I know one day I’ll have to do it (unless I go first, eck!) but it really brings me to tears even thinking about it.

2. Dying. I mean, who isn’t afraid of dying? Except Jesus. You know I don’t want to get all philosophical and spiritual here, but I get super weirded out when I think about how life will go on without me and what really happens to you/your spirit when you die. Alright, enough about death. Damn.

3. Going blind.  I have horrible eyesight and I am honestly terrified that one day I will go completely blind.  I couldn’t imagine not being able to see the people I love, watch tv (of course), and see all the beautiful things in the world.

4. Spiders. Okay, so once when I was in high school I woke up in the middle of the night to a gust of wind over my face.  I was thinking I needed to close my window or shut my ceiling fan off, but when I opened my eyes there was a gigantic spider hanging over my face. I still have nightmares about this and to this day when I see a spider I cry like a baby.

5. Snakes. I think it’s because they hide and they don’t blink, but they fucking creep me out. I’ve done stupid things to try and conquer this fear. Like this (side note: at the time I was like “I’M BRITNEY BITCH!” that was the only way I could talk myself into doing this):

photo-2

britney

(P.S. Mines bigger.)

But yes, that is a giant python around my neck. I should have been high off my ass when I did that, but I wasn’t, and I still can’t believe I actually did it.  However, take note that I am standing all awkward and refused to actually touch it, somehow that made it ok but didn’t help with my fear at all.

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Back to reality in 2013

Well happy 2013 folks! 2013 started out the same for me as 2012 ended, awesome.  And now, a mere 4 days into the New Year, I’m sad.  Because I’m back at work – BLAH! On a brighter note, everyone is healthy in 2013 so that’s a giant load off.
 
I typically don’t make New Year’s resolutions, and if I do, they are stupid.  One year in college, Lucky and I rang in the New Year by rolling around our lay-uer (actually layer, but pronounced LAYUUEER) playing the SIMS on Playstation and eating God knows what.  I don’t even think we drank, because we are the shit. Anyway, that year as I was stuffing cheese puffs and thin mints into my pie hole, I made the resolution to “Make people want more Gizzy”.  What is that? How do you even do that? Those are the types of resolutions I make. 
 
So I didn’t make a resolution this year, but I did have fun ringing in the New Year and celebrating the fact that the World didn’t get sucked into a black hole and shattered into a gazillion pieces.  Damn Mayans.
 
On Christmas night after making my rounds to all my family member’s houses and spending exactly 2 hours at each (the perfect amount of time), I hopped in my car and headed toward the mountains for a week at Nutter Butter’s family’s cabin, where the temperature was at a high of 15 on most days and the snowfall was up to my knees.  In the almost 3 years that we’ve had this blog, I can count zero times that I’ve talked about how much I love frolicking in the snow. That’s because I don’t love it, I like warm sandy beaches where I can tan my face off and drink margaritas by the pool. Typically when it snows I take that as an opportunity to put on my ugliest sweats so I can sit around and watch rom com’s and eat food until the ground thaws in the Spring.
 
On day 1 as soon as the sun rose, NB and I suited up for my first ever snowmobile ride – where I was the passenger and he was the driver.  I don’t know if any of you have ever riden on the back of a snowmobile, but I’m pretty sure that’s the closest I’ve ever come to dying.  Riding on the back is terrifying, driving your own, however, one of the most fun things I’ve ever done.  Sure I didn’t fall off at all when he was driving, and I fell off at least half a dozen times when I was driving myself, but you know how it is.
 
So along with snowmobiling, we also did some ice fishing, ice skating, hiking, skiing, sledding, sightseeing and shopping.  The best part was that there was no one around, so with the exception of the day we went shopping and the night we went to the local watering hole, I didn’t see another person for a week, or watch tv, and had no cell phone reception, and it was amazeballs.  I came back feeling all refreshed and relaxed and about 4 hours into work on Wednesday it felt like I had never left.  At this point, I would sell all of my belongings and live in a trailor at the top of a mountain for the rest of my life with a billygoat as my only companion just to go back to the solitude.
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Oh, goodmorning!

So I dropped the ball a lil bitty today by not being able to crank out a post.  You know what? It’s okay though, because what I’m about to show you will totally make up for it.  

A few Saturday’s ago about 3am I was sleeping when I heard a text come through on my phone.  I smiled in my sleep because I WANTED it to be a drunken text from high school crush telling me he loved me.  Instead it was a from a number I didn’t recognize, and the body of the text said this:

If anyone knows this girl, or knows anyone who knows this girl, please apologize for me.  Clearly, at 3am she sent this out to who she thought would’ve been a late night booty call.  Unfortunately for her, I’m the one who received it, passed it around to all of my friends, and am now sharing it with the world.

Good day.

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RIP my car

Ellooooo governa! This is going to be short and sweet as I’ve had one of the longest most whirlwind days of my life (talking about Wednesday here, not Thursday).  Not only was work hell and I made the executive decision to try and go through all of my emails and stay until 7pm when I should’ve left at 4 I came home to find one of my old college friends Periwinkle at my apartment.

I should back up a little, yes Lucky is coming to my house this weekend and I am SOOOOO excited, but Anth is also hosting a bachelor party of 20 guys at our house.  Hrmph.  Lucky and I have a list of things to do and places to be so hopefully they don’t get in the way.   Anyway, it’s Periwinkle’s bachelor party and he came in town yesterday to do some business before hand.

So when I got home, instead of doing my normal lay in my bed and nap for 3 hours, eat some dinner, and go back to bed I had to sit downstairs and socialize.  AND miss The Voice 😦 so not fair.  So I was already feeling a little out of my element.

9pm rolled around and I decided I should go tanning since I have 2 days left on my contract.  So I go and on my way home BAM CRASH BOOM.  Car accident.  I knew it was inevitable with traffic being the way it is here and the 8 million people, but I would’ve never guessed I would’ve gotten in an accident at 10 o’clock at night when there is 0 traffic.

So what happened? I’m minding my own business driving home and was about .2 miles from my apartment, like literally had to turn a corner and I’d be home when I go down a little slope and run into the side of this chick’s car.  She was pulling out of a parallel parking space and I don’t know she seemed pretty dingy, so she probably didn’t even look to see if any cars were coming.  I tried to stop but it didn’t happen.  My car is drivable… but it looks pretty rough…

So after I slam into the side of this girl’s car a guy jumps out and is looking at the damage, I fall out of my car like I almost died and he asks if I’m ok, I say yeah and dig through my purse to find my phone to call the cops all the while the driver is just sitting in the car.  I’m all, “Uhh is she ok?” And he’s like “Oh she hit her head.”  Eventually she gets out and says she’s fine, the cops tell us if the cars are driveable they’re not coming and we should just exchange information and come to the police station within 48 hours to file a report.  Some city huh?

So we do, by this time it’s pushing 10 (my bedtime) and I don’t feel like subjecting myself to a big city police station before bed.   The couple tells me they are going to go tonight to get it over with and I tell them I’m going to go tomorrow to kick off my vacation the right way. We leave and 30 minutes later I get a call from them saying they’re at a police station in the suburbs and the cops told them to tell me not to file another police report because having 2 would make it confusing.  Hrmmm… ok, and they also didn’t need a statement from me.  It’s weird.  They gave me a report number so I’m going to go to the police station and see if they’ll give me a copy of the report.  

BUT, I googled it and in anyway shape or form this accident is this girls fault, whether they filed the report or I did…. people pulling out of parking spots have to yield to oncoming traffic no matter what so I guess I should chillax.  

My poor little old car, now every time I go over a bump it makes this horrifying sound like it wants to die.  Stay strong car, stay strong, help is coming in the form of an insurance check. 

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Scum of the Earth (Part 2)

Last time we left off with Gigi informing me that my ex Snoop-Linus was trying to hook up with my Ex-friend Mercedes.  So, I made it for my mission for the night to find the hottest guy possible to hook up with…

We were at bar #1 for about 20 minutes when fight #1 between Gigi and her boyfriend broke out.  (Side note:  It is now my STRONG belief that boyfriends and girlfriends should not be drinking in social atmospheres together.  Dinner with friends where you don’t get up from the table? Ok! College bars? Not ok.) I was in the bathroom during the initial exchange of words, but when I got back Gigi was ready to roll out and no one else was coming with us.  Of course I couldn’t be a shitty friend and be like oook vagina blocks are gone lets get this party started! and had to suck it up and sit outside bar #1 and hear the sob story of why they were fighting (girl he hooked up with before they were together was within the 4 walls of the bar, not hanging out with them, or talking to him, crazy.)

Eventually we made it to bar #2 where upon entering a group of guys approached us and asked if we would hypothetically fuck their friend under the right circumstances.  HELLO! I didn’t want to sound like a slut, but this was EXACTLY what I was looking for!  I started giving said guy my sexy (drunk) eyes and licking my lips while his chatty friend wouldn’t shut up about how Gigi’s legs are a mile long and how she should be a runway model for Alexander McQueen.  Hold the bus.

Lets restate everything he just said and emphasize the important parts…

Asked if we would hypothetically fuck their friend under the right circumstances.  His chatty friend wouldn’t shut up about how Gigi’s legs are a mile long and how she should be a runway model for Alexander McQueen.

Is anyone else’s gaydar going off?

After he name dropped Alexander McQueen I checked out and ordered us a round of shots, and when I say us I mean me.  I ordered 4 and drank 4 all to myself.  I whip back around to hear, “Ahh if we weren’t gay we’d totally fuck the shit out of you girls.  Loves you!” Goddamnit, it’s true.  

After they walked away Gigi went back into depression mode.  “See gay guys think I’m hot, why can’t my own boyfriend appreciate me?!” And drug me over to the corner to hear more about how having a boyfriend is just soooo hard.  About that time here came Gigi’s boyfriend and his friends.  They tell us they are going back to his apartment and they’ll see us tomorrow.  It was 2:15 and I decided any chance I had at meeting a guy at that hour who wasn’t going to barf on me was slim to none.  I told Gigi that we should walk to taco bell and go back.  So we did, as we’re rounding the corner to her apartment she decided we needed to keep walking and go to her boyfriend’s.

We walk in and him and his friend are playing halo, Gigi sits down and immediately gets pissed that he’s not paying us any attention (mind you, it was also her boyfriend’s birthday) and says, “Fuck you assholes, we’re leaving.”  So off we go.  ALSO mind you, Gigi doesn’t have a phone and thus begins the fighting via MY PHONE.  They fought on the phone about nothing important for upwards of 2 hours until they finally drunkenly ended the relationship.  I love my friend to death, but thank god I couldn’t take it anymore, now I can get some sleep and dream about all the ass I’m not getting.  Nope.  Then Gigi sobs to me for another 2 hours first about her boyfriend which then turns into how her 4 best friends from high school are neglecting her and how no one bought her a birthday cake and god knows what else.  Sometime around 7am she finally decided she was all cried out and we went to sleep.  

At 8:24am her boyfriend starts non-stop calling my phone because why? They are supposed to leave at 10am to go on his birthday camping trip and need to go to the store before hand to get supplies.  I get up and tell her he’s calling, she waves her hand away so I take that as she doesn’t want to talk to him and go back to sleep.  30 minutes later she wakes up scrambling around and calls him back.  They fight for another 2 hours now about how he can’t remember what they were fighting about the night before, and then they decide they should meet up to fight and start to fight about whose place they should fight at.  Like really? I kind of wanted to die.  They break up again and Gigi says he can go on the camping trip alone.  Before she can get emotional/call him again I interject with a, “Heyyy lets go get some breakfast, that will make you feel better!” Honestly, if I didn’t get food in me ASAP I was going to be ralphing grade D beef, hot sauce, and tequila down my shirt.  We did and on the way Gigi FINALLY realized she was being a bitch because it was his birthday after all and decides to call him and invite him to breakfast.  Of course he doesn’t want to go, because who would? And they decide they will get together to fight when we’re done eating.  Post breakfast we walk over to his place, his friend and I pop Bad News Bears into the DVD player and pass out on our separate futons to be awoken 2 hours later by a back together Gigi and boyfriend.  Gigi takes me back to her place so I can slit my wrists and go home and tells me this is pretty typical of them when they drink.  Shit, I’d either be not drinking or breaking up.  That fight exhausted me and I was only an innocent bi-stander.  

So there you have it, another weekend of no action and another weekend to add to the 14 month dry spell.  If I stop posting and responding to comments all together it’s probably because I got arrested for selling it on the street.  Forrrr a nickel.

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Scum of the Earth (Part 1)

I had my big weekend back at SHIT U this past weekend and it was pretty blahsville.  I didn’t get laid, run into HOTTIE, or even get a make out from a stranger.  All thumbs point to down.  But as always, SHIT U didn’t fail to deliver the drama dramz we all know and love.  

As soon as I walked in Gigi’s door Friday night she told me to sit down because she had some news and I needed to brace myself for it.  She started telling me about how Wednesday night she had to work with Mercedes in a city near where Snoop-Linus lives…  

First, I need to update everyone on my non-friendship with Mercedes.  I just dug through our archived posts and realized I never informed everyone of the demise of our friendship.  Back in November she sent me a shitty text, I can’t remember verbatim what it said but it was something along the lines of saying I should get back together with Snoop-Linus because we deserve each other.  She had told me on a work outing that one of his friends told her he had cheated on me upwards of 10-15 times.  At the time we had only been broken up about 4 months and I still wanted to know the truth so of course I confronted him about it.  Several months later it got back to Mercedes that I had confronted him what she said and of course he denied it.  She got pissed and sent that text, and also sent a text saying, “Mercedes out.” Thank god for that.

I never replied,un-friended her and all of her accomplices on facebook, and didn’t hear from her directly until a few weeks ago. Sometime in January/February she told Snoop-Linus I knew all his passwords when we were dating and that’s how I found everything out, which of course caused a confrontation between Snoop-Linus and myself. Then a few weeks ago she sent me the following facebook message:

hey. i know this is random, but i need my original sims disk back. my current game keeps freezing so i think i need to reinstall it, not to mention theres a new expansion pack coming out at the end of the month, need to have my shit under control by then. pleeease if you still have it, mail it to 1234 Main Street. and let me know if you dont so im not anxiously awaiting the mail lady. thanks!

I hate bitches who think they can do me wrong and then come back 6 months later and expect me to be like, OH YA NO PROB HERE YA GO FRIEND.  No.  I didn’t reply.  I know what you’re all thinking (especially Lucky) why didn’t I block her on facebook from the get go?  Well I should have, but after I un-friended her she blocked me and you can’t block people who have blocked you.  After the time lapsed and the new expansion pack came out she re-blocked me so it’s back to pretending each other don’t exist.  This story is getting more pathetic as I go on now talking about facebook blocking and the SIMS.  Christ.  

Anyway, back to the original story… so Mercedes is now pretty much my arch nemesis and her and Gigi were headed up to Snoop-Linus’ neck of the woods last week for work.  On the way there Mercedes starts to tell Gigi about how Snoop-Linus has been calling and texting her on the reg trying to hang out with her, telling her if she’s ever up there to hit him up so they can go out and party, and basically putting in some phone time so that she’ll feel comfortable letting him get in her pants.  That’s how I took it anyway.  

Gigi being the pot-stirrer that she is, she instructs Mercedes to text Snoop-Linus and tell him she will be in town.  So she does and instead of texting her back he immediately calls her.  Mercedes answers and Gigi says the convo went down on speakerphone and Snoop was all, you should score us a hotel room and we can go out and get crunk (I am ashamed that I ever dated someone who talks like this) and then go back to the room after.  Mercedes was all, well I don’t know I have to work but I’ll let you know when I get off.  So that was that.  Then Gigi said on their way home Snoop was doing the crazy girl call and calling Mercedes like every 5 minutes trying to see if they were going to meet up.  Mercedes didn’t answer and Gigi informed her I was going to find out about this so to prepare herself for any lashings that might come her way.

Gigi told me and while yes it is typical of Snoop-Linus to do this and something new I can add to my list of shitty things he’s done to me, I can honestly say I don’t give a flying fuck.  They can hook up, get drunk, date, even get married, and have kids for all I care.  They’re both the scum of the earth and I want nothing to do with either of them ever again.  Shit, I even encourage this! Ex-boyfriend Scum of the Earth meet Ex-friend Scum of the Earth, now go have Scum of the Earth babies and rot in hell.

That whole incident didn’t anger me as much as it gave me the mindset of now I really need to get laid tonight so he is not the last person I slept with.  I went out with a mission, informed everyone we were with of my mission and had 8 extra eyes helping me scope the scene for hot men.

To be continued…

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